Simply Unforgettable

Dearest Bobbi,

For quite awhile things have been rather rocky in our marriage. We’ve been a lot like our Chihuahua dogs, Rosco and Chico, when they fight. From experience, we both know that warring Chihuahuas can be both vicious and bloody. The result is all parties involved manage to get hurt somehow.

Changing the subject, you know how expensive roses have gotten? You deserve five dozen roses, but all our budget can handle is the background on this post. Enjoy the wonderfully fragrant aroma.

I remember when we first met over the phone. Long distance communication was important. Our wedding and honeymoon photos show a couple deeply in love. I think we’ve both allowed all of our many challenging life experiences to separate us emotionally. I know we both agree some kind of positive change needs to happen.

I can honestly say that I’ve never met anyone like you. You have a kind heart, and a personality that wishes to assist and encourage others (just like me). Maybe I’ve never completely expressed this before, but I need you to keep this crazy unit known as our family (dogs included) from spinning off into who knows where.

You always make me look good as your husband. You are definitely an asset to all the goals I aspire to in life. When we are seen together, I wonder how many individuals think, “What a goof. He definitely married up.”

A line of Nat King Cole’s Unforgettable says,

That’s why, darling, it’s incredible

That someone so unforgettable

Thinks that I am

Unforgettable, too.

It’s us. I won’t drag this post on any longer. Always know, I love you, and I got your back.

XXXXXOOOOOOXXXXOOOO

Your Man, Robert

Unplanned

For any individual that is a Greeter at a store, communication is the major part of your job. Joyfully greeting customers with their patronage as they enter the store comes first.

Then sometimes there’s resolving customer inquiries when various individuals are inside the store. A Greeter’s duties with the guest usually conclude as they exit the door, and they are told to have a great day.

At times, a guest and Greeter have a verbal connection is made for various things (it is discovered) the two have in common. The two lose track of time as a lengthy conversation continues with the Greeter breaking away every few seconds to welcome the customers flowing in on a regular basis. It’s all unintended.

“Caralynn” was an attractive black woman in her 30’s. We could relate to each other on two levels. When Caralynn found out I was diabetic, she encouraged me to be vigilant in controlling my diet, monitoring my sugar, and taking my insulin when needed. Both of her parents had died of diabetic-related disease. (Her mother died when she was seventeen.)

My diabetes was something that was often all over the place. My hunger for large amounts of food (good and bad) constantly was the culprit. It was gloomy. I thought I was hiding this issue well. Caralynn sensed my low grade of depression, and she told me so.

Caralynn then let me she had bariatric surgery in 2008. She had gone from a size 22 to a size 8.   I told her about the 144 pounds my wife, Bobbi, had lost so far. We reminisced about the challenging road of life after weight loss surgery.

Caralynn had noticed (during her life) that though many black females are taught the importance of personal self-esteem (throughout their life), healthy weight management is sorely lacking. Before our conversation concluded, I discovered Caralynn was fluent in both English and Spanish.

You discover some unplanned things in life are pleasant surprises, and you are glad they came your way. Are you willing to open your heart and mind to the beautiful blessings God brings your way? Be prepared for this. You never know when it could happen. Isn’t life wonderful with all its randomness?

The All New Throw Your Weight Around Diet and Exercise Plan

If you are worried about not getting all the exercise you need because you’re not jogging, swimming, or playing tennis, worry no more.

A recent study reveals that many activities, despite their sedentary nature, burn up calories. The following chart shows the number of calories burned per hour for each of these activities.

1.   Beating around the bush 75

2.   Coming to conclusions 100

3.   Climbing the walls 150

4.   Swallowing your pride 50

5.   Passing the buck 25

6.   Throwing your weight around (depending on your weight)  50-300

7.   Dragging your heels 100

8.   Pushing your luck 250

9.   Making mountains out of molehills 500

10.                     Adding fuel to the fire 150

11.                     Hitting the nail on the head 50

12.                     Wading through paperwork 300

13.                     Bending over backward 75

14.                     Jumping on the bandwagon 200

15.                     Running around in circles 350

16.                     Eating crow 225

17.                     Tooting your own horn 25

18.                     Climbing the ladder of success 250

19.                     Pulling out all the stops 75

20.                     Wrapping it up at day’s end 12

Ø A Funcard from Kwik Koping Printing

The Author

April 27, 2012

Dear New Show Creator,

As you know there seem to be a plethora of reality shows for anything the human mind can imagine. Not yet have I seen one for those with the passion of writing. THE AUTHOR would fill that void. Though I don’t have this idea completely fleshed out, here’s what I do have.

 The five person judging panel would consist of well-known authors, publishers, and actor writers. The grand prize would be the contestants’ work being produced by a major publishing house.  This reality show would be for first-time writers only. They would be required to submit a maximum 200 page fiction or non-fiction manuscript in a format approved by your organization.

Elimination rounds for this hour long show could include the most creative title; most compelling thirty second vocal summary of the book by the author; the most interesting first chapter read by the judges that would invoke them to purchase this book if it were in bookstores today; or the most improved work after a professional editing. That’s all I have right now. I know this opportunity could be a dream come true for the lucky individual deemed the winner.

Sincerely,

Robert Kinker (published)

The Challenge

My marriage to my wife, Bobbi, on November 13, 1993, has been a challenge. We are both natural opinionated extrovert Leos. Our marital ministry involvement at the churches we have attended, have included Prayer Couple Coordinators for Baptist Marriage Encounter and attendance to more marriage seminars than I can count.

Marriage counseling over the years has helped every morning I wake up is a daily decision on the type of husband I will be for Bobbi.  I can be the Robert she needs to stay forever, or the other Robert she wishes would leave immediately and never return.

In the office of one of the many counselors we went to (as a couple), we were asked to write down our mate’s positive and negative qualities. Though my notes on Bobbi have been lost for some time, I recently found on my computer what positive things she said about me, as well as what she would like changed. Here is what she wrote:

PRO’S

1.   Family is a priority to Robert.

2.   I appreciate his talent to remember scripture.

3.   I appreciate his artistic, vocal, and written talents.

4.   I appreciate that he is helpful around the house (although there are times he is not)

5.   I appreciate that he doesn’t squander his paycheck, or doesn’t go out drinking.

6.   He takes care of the library items for our family.

7.   Robert is willing to do things for other when he realizes there is a need.

8.   He would sacrifice for others important to himself.

9.   When he is in a great mood, he is very jovial. His laughter makes me smile.

10.                     When he jokes around he lightens the mood.

11.                     He brings good qualities to his friends and family. (He is willing to show or help others to see things that will help them grow.)

12.                     His many good qualities are include his love for God, reading, singing, and kindness (when Robert wants to be he is really kind).

CON’S

1.   I would give him the memory I know he wants.

2.   Take the Attention Deficit Hyper Disorder (ADHD) away. (He has always hated what it does to him.

3.   I would make him care for me the way he does for others.

4.   I would give him self-control and use self-control when in public (words actions).

5.   I would like give him the ability to have boundaries (when timing is right or wrong, and when to stop or start something).

6.   I would like to give him common sense so he doesn’t feel different, and so we can understand each other better.

7.   I would like to give him self confidence so that he can be the leader he wants to be in the home.

8.   I would like give him the ability to take his desire away to be the center of attention.

9.   I would like give him the ability to share his feelings with me, and not everyone else.

10.                     I would like him to keep his thought life clean. (I know he struggles with this.)

11.                     I would like to take “I don’t care out of his vocabulary.” This provokes thoughts in me that I don’t know how to handle.

12.                     I would like give him the ability to love me again.

13.                     I would like give him the ability to think before he says and does things. “How will this affect my relationship or my wife and family? (This is part of the I-don’t-care attitude.)

I wish I could tell you that I am wonderful all the time, and that I never have my horribly mean days. A good marriage can be a union with your best friend. A terrible marriage can be an exercise in never ending agony.

Slipping in bed at night close to someone you love dearly is much more preferable than sleeping on opposite ends of the bed because you want to have nothing to do with. Like anything difficult that is worth having, good marriages don’t just happen. They require lots of hard work (much like landscaping). No one is perfect. We are all works in progress.

The Gift

If you are a man with children, you know that Father’s Day can almost be more wonderful than a lifetime of Christmases. This holiday is not dependent on the age of the child or the quality of the gift. All that matters is some kind of recognition from your off spring on your contribution to who they are today.

When my daughter was just fifteen she got her first Parallel Study Bible (contains two biblical versions) with her name engraved on the front. The color of the leather cover reminded me a lot of a tween girl’s slumber party with its primary colors of orchid pink and raspberry pink.

In December 2014, I began my blog, Encourage Me. I found Allena’s barely used Bible a great research tool when I wished to add scripture to a post. I held only tightly to my daughter’s parallel study Bible. I knew if it landed in her room or car, chances were good I’d never see it again.

The time came when Allena was starting to use her Bible more for church and her own personal study. It was time to let go of my biblical buddy. With sad heart I mentioned to my family I would love to have a Bible like Allena’s. I wondered if anyone had really heard me.

On the Saturday before Father’s Day 2015, I got a heartfelt card from my daughter expressing her love for me. Next to it was a small box wrapped in green, blue, and white striped paper. When I opened the gift, I was speechless (seldom happens) as to how my wife and daughter had chosen to show their true feelings for me. (I was starting to get all warm and fuzzy as I couldn’t stop smiling.)

Inside the box, was a Side-by-Side Bible in the manly colors of gray and slate blue. Contained in this Bible were the New International Version (NIV), the New King James Version (NKJV), the New Living Translation (NLT), and The Message (MSG). My full name was also engraved on the front of this Bible so that anyone who found it would know who it belonged to.

It was nice the print on this Bible was standard (so I can easily read it), and that I didn’t have to break it in. This Bible was designed to lay flat any where I opened. My family loved a good deal. This $100 Bible was on clearance for $50. This was the best Father’s Day. I was thrilled beyond belief. This Bible would make my leisurely scripture reading and research for my posts twice as easy.

Part of me wonders if my new Side-by-Side Bible might have some kind of magical abilities to be present verbally when it is needed. When I mentioned my Father’s Day gift to Jaisa (a college age co-worker friend of mine), she mentioned that she was in the market for a new Bible, and would love to see mine at work the next day.

What is the chance that this conversation would end as it did? When my co-worker viewed the Bible on Monday afternoon, she was so sold on it that she wanted one for her and her mother.

When was the last time someone did something kind for you? Was it a surprise or did you know about it? When was the last time you did a good deed for someone? What kind of feeling does that type of service leave you with?

Suggestions may include complimenting someone on their clothing, saying a positive word to cheer someone up, or doing a chore for someone who can’t do it themselves. The possibilities are endless. You can make a big impression with little or no cash. Give this a try.

Invitation from the Almighty

I define the term “God moment” as an opportunity provided to humans to participate in an event that is truly divine. My God moments have involved a pastor, a receptionist, and a store customer.  Someone even gave me a God moment (see Totally Surprised). I would like to provide you with two imperfect biblical individuals who had God moments. What did they do with these heavenly opportunities? Can you find more of these in the scripture?

In Exodus 6:28-7:7, a senior citizen Moses (eighty years old) had a God moment. He was being asked by the Almighty to speak with Pharaoh (the most powerful ruler of that day to allow his slave labor (the Israelites) free. Moses objected to God’s plans due to his stuttering. You’ve seen the multitude of movies on the life of this imperfect saint. Read his complete story in the book of Exodus.

In Luke 1:26-38, a teenager (best scholarly estimate) named Mary was visited by angel named Gabriel with a message from the Almighty. Her God moment included becoming mother to the Messiah (Jesus).

Her question included how could a virgin become pregnant. Like Moses, there was probably fear to her heavenly communication. In Mary’s case, I assume the angel Gabriel may have been a scary sight. Every Christmas you find out the conclusion to this story found in the pages of the Gospel.

God moments will most assuredly take you out of your comfort zone. You may not feel wonderful after they are over either. If God wants you to carry out a mission for him all you can do is submit like Mary did in Luke 1:38. Who wants to fight against God when you can love Him instead? It is a foolish thing for a wise person to try to resist the will of the Heavenly Father. Eventually,  the Almighty will have His way.

Dead Wrong

It was Friday (around 12:30pm). I had just relieved my co-worker (on the grocery-side of the store) so he could go to lunch. I was just a few minutes later that “Rudy” came through the door.

I was breathless and speechless. I had never expected the person Rudy to ever revisit me during my lifetime ever. Before my focus became clear (and the blinders came off), I swear my late stepfather, Robert Zarbaugh, was walking back into my life. He’d died in October 14, 2011 of Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) at Grant Medical Center in Columbus, OH. (The “death rattle” was a horrible thing to hear.)

Everything about this Robert looked healthy. He was missing his signature hat positioned just perfectly on his semi-bald head. I didn’t think I’d ever seen him in a colorful Hawaiian shirt during the time period I knew him as step-father. It looked good on him. This was not the first time my one of my family members had seen Robert Z after his death (see Like Mother, Like Daughter).

In seconds, questions flooded my mind like: “Why are you here in this store? Aren’t you supposed to be dead? Where have you been since your death? How will I ever explain this to my mother, who took your passing so hard?

As Rudy proceeded further into the store, the fog lifted from my mind. I instantaneously realized my stepfather had not come back to life. Had this been a message from Robert to me? I wasn’t sure. Would the answer ever come to me?

Has this ever happened to you? Have you seen a twin of a dead person? In that moment what emotions did you experience? Were they appreciative (for their life) or lonely (for how much you still missed them)? Was their a message you should have gotten? Did you get it loud and clear?

A Failure

I have never been a model diabetic. (I have never been successful at this important endeavor in my life.) love eating all the wrong kinds of food (at the wrong time of day).  I’ve taken diabetes nutritional classes, but always wonder which nurse is going to watch my eating habits 24/7.

Many diabetics are concerned with their feet. Mine are in good shape with hair growth (foot circulation), no numbness (in my feet), or neuropathy pain (like many needle pricks).

When my sugar readings are frequently high (200-300 when 120 is the norm), insulin is used to bring that number closer to what it should be. Insulin and I have a peculiar relationship. One day I can use one amount and my sugar reading changes to what it needs to be.

The next day I have a similar reading, and give myself the same amount of insulin to bring it to where it should be. Instead I bottom out (or dump) to a sugar reading that is way too low. The results are not good.

When I arrived at work twenty minutes before my 8am shift on Monday, 6/15/15, little did I know this workday was going to turn out to be almost identical (to the job training done at Life Care Alliance)

About forty-five minutes after my greeter start-time, that bad feeling I knew well as a diabetic started up. In attempts to get my high sugar reading from earlier that morning down, I’d obviously injected too much insulin.  I was sweating hard all over body, and felt like I was in a sauna. (I wished the majority of my clothes could come off to get some relief, but that definitely would not bring clientele into the store.)

The next thing to happen was the fuzzy feeling in my head where I really was having difficulty understanding my co-workers (and my wife I was communicating with on my cell phone).

In my weak attempts to stop the whole process, I squeezed the mandarin orange glucose gel into my mouth. Hopefully, everything would be better soon. It wasn’t working. I had never brought my glucometer to work to test my sugar.

That had worked before, but that wasn’t going to cut it now. The store did not have this contraption for employee use. (Before I took my glucose gel I estimated my sugar had been around 49. When I tested my sugar at home it was 79.)

I was soon told to sit down on a nearby bench with my face quite flushed to the shade of bright pink (as I am told). Bobbi had contacted guest services to make them aware of my issue who then made the manager in charge alert to my situation.

My wife had also told my daughter to be my chauffeur home leaving the Outlander in the parking lot. (The women at work told me I would absolutely not be driving home.)

These episodes make me very tired and hungry. Both needs were satisfied until I felt much better. Later that day, Allena (and I) went to work for her deli shift. From there, I picked up the family car, and got Bobbi and (her riders) from work.

I’m sure I don’t need to remind you that things often happen that we don’t expect (or want). In these situations, it’s always best to get back to a state of normalcy as soon as possible. Do you have limitations? What are they? Can they be exceeded, or do you need to live with them? I wish I had the answers for you, but I don’t even have that for myself. Only you can make the choice that is best for your life.

Crash and a Pain

When he walked in the door and the two of us began talking. I learned “Tim” was one of those unique souls that has been through more pain than anyone should have to deal with in a lifetime.

Due to several horrendous car accidents, Tim had a variety of costly metal rods in both his arms (with the scars to prove it). One of the automobile injuries had caused Tim to be in a coma for several months.

During our conversation, I learned we had both had brain surgery in common. It is a daunting procedure for anyone to go through. My procedure had been near the base of my brain to discover what the mass near my brain stem was.

Tim had several holes drilled in the top of his brain to relieve the mounting pressure building up there. We showed each other our scars of courage (and fear).

Eventually all Tim’s children showed up. His wife was somewhere shopping in the store, and he needed to find her. She had been in one of his car wrecks with him, and had also suffered a coma.

Due to the head trauma of this couple, for a brief period of time both of these people were medically restricted from driving or living in their home by themselves. (Can you imagine all the things in a house that could be dangerous to someone that was not in their right mind?)

Sometimes people can find unpleasant life experiences as  common factor. That could be something like illness or a life trauma. These are events you did not wish or ask for. Don’t overestimate what a powerful connecting factor between individuals that they can be.

Never be afraid to open up this painful part of your heart to share with someone. So open up, and become the real person you’ve always hoped to be.

A Pain in the Back

On this Friday, “Cat,” one of the store’s senior shoppers, had just stopped by my door with a full shopping cart of groceries. She needed to exit “the grocery-side” doors I was greeting at to take a quick bathroom break. Somehow, Cat and I always managed to consistently see each other whenever she was in the store. (Doesn’t that sort of sound like an unusual variation of a groupie?)

Before she left, we discussed her sore back that she had not gotten relief with the use of pain relief cream, heat wraps, or a brace. Surgery for her back had been discussed with one doctor.

He said a side effect to this operation would be her inability to ever walk again. She was meeting with another back doctor soon for a second opinion. I felt that was a wise thing to do. As Cat left for the ladies room, I knew what needed to be done.

My decision seemed like the thing God was burdening me to do. Usually this is not something I would do at this job. Most the time it was not appropriate, but it was different this time.

I didn’t think management (and especially my boss Brandon) would approve of my choice, but I wasn’t asking them to find out.  Cat returned to her cart. I asked her if I could say a prayer for her. Her response was, “it sure couldn’t hurt?”

As the two of us bowed our heads, my prayer to God was quiet, quick, and to-the-point. In the corner of my eye, I could see a steady stream of unwelcomed customers pouring through my doors.

I remember my heavenly plea going something like this: “Dear God, please take the pain away from Cat’s back. Help her to find a doctor that can do the surgery on her back without paralyzing her permanently. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.”

In just a few seconds, Cat had left and I was back to doing the job I was being paid for.  Have you ever felt lead to pray for someone in unusual circumstances? Did you follow through or chicken out?

You have no idea how your simple prayer could make a positive difference in the life of the person that desperately needs it. Let me ask you, “What have you got to lose?” “Nothing, but your pride” is the answer. Remember, you are desperately needed for this very important mission as a on-the-spot prayer warrior. 

Fear Factor

I have a whole list of things that scare me (or at the least cause me paranoia). I want to share them with you. (Maybe you can stroll down Memory’s Lane with me if you have the stomach for it.)

When it comes to dreams, there are two that occasionally terrorize my dreams. Both are education-related. In dream one, I’m unsure what school I’m in, or the grade for sure. (I’m guessing middle school.) I’m kneeling at my locker to retrieve books for the next class. I can’t figure out the lock combination to open my locker to get my books. The bell is ringing. I’m in utter panic realizing I may be late for class.

Dream number two involves Bob Jones University in Greenville, SC, the college I graduated from in 1986 (see The World’s Most Unusual University). My experience there was pleasant. In this current day dream, I have a wife and daughter, who are somewhere else outside of the dream. I am unaware of the age of me or my family.

For some reason, I am back in a dorm room at the study desk. Though my three roommates are not in the dream, I am aware of their existence. I am conscious of where I am, and what is happening.

There is complete dread at the thought of reliving my college days over. I did it once, and don’t have any desire to do it again at this point in my life.

The only other part of this dream I remember is me getting on the freeway to get to an unknown home destination. If anyone knows what these two dreams, I would love an analysis.

A paranoia I deal with today involves my car. I can back out of our garage, but I will not drive into it. Years ago when we had another automobile; I drove into the garage, and lopped off the right side mirror.

Though I have successfully pulled into our garage several times, the thought of me possibly knocking the side mirror off our Outlander cripples me emotionally from performing this function on a regular basis. (The challenge of backing out doesn’t cause me the same unrest though it should.)

One mental terror involves this blog, Encourage Me. When I go several days without writing something (I consider substantial), I get nervous that I’ve written my last post.

The fear is that there is nothing creative left in my mind. Then it happens. Something worthwhile emerges at home or work or a topic evolves, and I’m back at blogging again.

If you have ever noticed the total number of posts I have on Encourage Me, chances are the well of my imagination will not be drying up any time soon.

For short periods of time, I have misplaced my cell phone (contains all my contacts), my zip drive (has a lot of my writings), and my work I.D. (how I clock in). When I don’t know where these items are, I get rather panicky as they are crucial to my world.

Fears don’t really help us; do they? Many times paranoia is not always based in reality. We are all infallible humans that have erred at times. Sometimes, the test of who we are is based on how well we can cope with our tragedies. In the long run it doesn’t benefit you to close yourself to various things that you deem unpleasant. In the end, life is a journey. How well will you travel it?

Guess What?

When my adult daughter became friends with her co-worker “Marsha” in the deli department of the store both of us are employed at, I was happy for her but didn’t pay too much attention.

Recently Allena got to spend the night with Marsha and her husband, who also worked at the same store. According to Allena he worked at the U-scan and somewhere around the shoe department.

Their girl time together included Allena getting her hair lightened, and fishing at Creekside in Gahanna, OH. (Allena caught and helped fry three bluegill fish.)

On my return from lunch, I saw Allena. She informed me Marsha’s husband knew me, and was certain I didn’t like him. I’d even tried to get him in trouble. By this time, I was completely clueless as to whom she was referring to.

When the word “Cleo” was spoken by my daughter, I was in complete astonishment. As you will remember from the posts Open Mouth and Insert Foot and One More Time, my feelings about Cleo were not positive due to inappropriate comments he made several times in my presence.

Allena becoming friends with this couple was going to mean one thing for me, her father. If my daughter saw redeeming qualities in Cleo, maybe I should forgive him, and realize we all have bad days. Through this unusual surprise, God was going to make sure I was put my sense of equality into something real.

Has anything similar to this ever happened in your life? It rocks your sense of rightness; doesn’t it? Like me do you feel there is a greater lesson for you? Will your old attitude persist, or will a new more improved you rise to the situation? Only you and God know.

The Diagnosis

In May of 2009, doctors knew I was ill with something. They just didn’t know what it was. Four months later they discovered it was a cancer called “Lymphoma.” Not knowing what I had was emotionally draining and worrisome (about my future).

Once the monster inside me had been identified, along with my doctor I could now proceed forward with a strong cocktail of chemotherapy. The shred of hope inside me for remission now had something to hang on to with the name of Non-Hodgkins Mantel Cell B Lymphoma.

The afternoon of Tuesday, June 9, 2015, had been another turning point for me. A month prior when I saw a TV commercial for Binge Eating Disorder (B.E.D.), it was like a light went off in my head. Everything that was being described about my unmanageable eating habits resonated inside of me (see It’s B.E.D. Time). I just knew that I needed to get my primary care physician opinion about this.

Part of me was worried about talking to “Dr. Brendeman” about B.E.D. I was afraid she would have no idea about it, nor would she agree with me that I had it. In that case, I made up a file card on the illness as well as my diabetic sugar journal (that records my readings and the amount of insulin I take).

When I talked with Dr. Brendeman about why I felt a B.E.D. described me and showed her all my high sugar annotations, she agreed that this was something I had. Her only recommendation was to see the psychiatrist that recommends my psychiatric medication to make sure Vyvance would not have a negative interaction with any of the medications “Dr Bluckman” prescribes since B.E.D is a psychiatric issue.

You can believe as soon as I got home that I called, and left a message for Dr Bluckman’s office to get back with me (see Pathway to Forgiveness).

A weight had been lifted from my shoulders to know I had an illness that was causing affecting my eating habits. (Trying to do better wouldn’t or aid my diabetes) Somewhere inside of “Robert” I had known the excessive eating I had done for the longest time was abnormal.

When I told my wife, Bobbi, she was glad but wondered if some part of my brain (that controls my appetite) was rearranged when brain surgery was done to discover what I was ill with.

Have you ever been in a place similar to what’s described in this post? When it comes to your health isn’t it great to know the truth so your life can be dealt with as efficiently as possible. It’s great to have control of your health.

Be assured the outcome of any health crisis is being handled by a loving Heavenly Father that always has your best interest at heart. Trust Him even when your life path looks unsure.

Performance Issues

Do you ever question your abilities at work? It seems to happen to me on a daily basis as a greeter. When someone asks me where something is in the store, I momentarily freeze in confusion until the calm voice of experience takes over. Deep inside me a whisper says “No need to worry. You got this.”

Most the time I can give the customer one or two ideas as to where there desired item may be in the store no matter whether it might be for example sunscreen, diapers, metal trash cans, or batteries.

 I consider myself an expert on the grocery section of the store. That would be because of the cheat sheet folded up in the back of my badge. It briefly summarizes all the store’s grocery aisles and their freezer section. This helps me remember things like the frequently asked aisle thirteen (laundry and cleaning), which never comes to mind when I need it.

Here’s something for you need to consider. Is there a creative way to make your job smoother and easier to perform? Are you where God wants you to be career-wise? Pray about it. You might be surprised with the answer God supplies.

Who in your workplace could use a smile, a kind word, or a ray of encouragement? You could honestly be the difference between life and death for a co-worker of yours.

If you excel at what you do, stop always questioning yourself. If you need training to reach a place of excellence in your position, keep asking for it until you get it. (Become a nuisance if you must.) A positive approach goes a long way in seeing your job in a whole new way.   

Falling for You

It was a Friday at work, and I wasn’t expecting much excitement. Was I wrong? Around 8:30am, a senior citizen dressed for summer “Ernie” and his claw foot (four feet) cane were a bit wobbly as the two began to enter the door closest to the large display of bottled water. Before Ernie could enter into the store, he fell hard on his elbows as he was almost inside the store.

At this point, all I could think was to find a lead that could help Ernie up safely. I didn’t want to cause any additional damage. It was interesting to see all the people that swarmed around Ernie to offer assistance (in getting him patched up) just like bees swarming around honey. This included someone cleaning up fluids, which I believe were vomit.

Later that evening at my home (around 7pm) I thought of Ernie as I left the bathroom in my room, and tripped up the stairs to the hardwood floors on the main level. Unlike Ernie, my knees took the brunt of the fall.

I have many regrets with the way I dealt with Ernie’s issue. When I saw him wobbling, should I have walked him in arm-in-arm? When he began to fall should I have somehow tried to stop that from happening (by blocking or grabbing him)? It all occurred so fast, and I really believed he was somehow going to right himself at the end.

At around 12:30pm in our Gahanna home, Allena was alone relaxing on the couch (with the electronic foot rest out). With her left hand she was holding the metal brace that connected the foot rest. What Allena didn’t realize (until it was too late) was that the big toe of her right foot was pushing the button to close the foot rest.

The three Chihuahuas didn’t make one sound as Allena screamed in horror and pain as her smashed finger was bleeding onto her arm. She was eventually able to release her damaged finger from the foot rest. After a nearby urgent care visit, her middle finger was wrapped, and antibiotics were prescribed. Allena’s finger became numb. It turned out the nail on her finger was cut along the edge. It may eventually fall off.

When Allena called Bobbi, she was crying hard (heaving), difficult to understand, and loud in volume. By the time Bobbi communicated it to me, the story was quiet and condensed down to a text. (I was surprised to find out our new kitchen knives had not caused the damage.) Allena stopped by the store to give her boss her one day doctor’s excuse. Her boss was not happy, but my daughter looked as if she’d been through a very tough lesson in being an adult, and trusting your own survival instincts.

 “Dottie” was my comic relief close to the end of my work shift (though she didn’t know that at the time). As Dottie got her cart, I couldn’t tell you exactly what we talked about. What I do remember was her shirt. I could see the printed shirt tag, and seams that belonged on the inside of a shirt. (Had Dottie paid attention when she dressed this morning?)

As Dottie walked away from me, in good conscience I couldn’t allow a guest of this store to proceed any further unaware (I believed) that their shirt was inside out. So I tapped Dottie lightly on the right shoulder, (and kindly asked)”Did you know your shirt is inside out?”

Dottie was unaware, and went to the women’s bathroom to take care of the issue. When came out, she was already for a great shopping trip. A former greeter told she had noticed the problem, but was too embarrassed for Dottie to say anything. I can be bold enough to save another human being from embarrassment.

On this day, “Sarah” was my second customer so far to ask (more like challenge) me when I was getting bariatric surgery after I’d discussed my wife’s success with it (see Coming Attractions).

My brain is still trying to figure out if I should take these compliments as concern or nosiness. (Is God trying to tell me something?) My wife will be with me on my July 7, 2015 consultation with the same doctor that did her surgery. I am nervous to see where all this will lead to.

We all know life is messy with nothing neat about it. Some experiences are painful or just plain embarrassing. Our duty while we are here in this world is to make the path easier for someone else. What can you do? All of us are students here in our existence here on Earth. How close are you in learning the lessons you are being taught?

Zip It Up

It was a Monday. I was only an hour and a half (11:30am) into my four hour shift when a catastrophe arose in the grocery-side men’s bathroom for me. When I went to zip up my black pants, the zipper broke. I knew it was against store rules to wear the red company work shirt untucked. I looked down, and realized pinning the area would be a rather unsafe option (as accident prone as I am). I didn’t want to prick myself, or have to undo the safety pin eveytime I went to the bathroom.

 With my daughter’s busy schedule, I was uncertain she could bring me another pair of pants before the end of my shift. I couldn’t leave the zipper open (exposing my underwear) as I did not want both customers and employees reminding me my fly was open. I quickly stepped into the handicap stall, and locked the door.

I quickly adjusted the suspenders on my bare skin, and put the shirt back on as it covered the problem area of my pants. Any man who has ever worn suspenders under an untucked shirt knows this one basic rule. You always wear a t-shirt underneath. It stops strap rubbing on your flesh in a variety of places, and keeps the adjustment clips from scraping you in two rather sensitive areas.

When I finally returned to my greeting location (at the other end of the store), it felt much better to not have all that material crammed in my pants. Air was getting in there. This was not the way I wished to get my way in being a rebel with the dress code. I was absolutely paranoid my boss was going to see me bucking the system like this. (This wasn’t on purpose.)

“Brandon” did not disappoint me. Though others had gotten away with this dress code infraction, a greeter was different. That’s what I thought Brandon felt. I was the face of the store, and had to look professional.

(I really don’t feel tucked or untucked was a big deal to any of the guests during my work shift.) When I explained to Brandon the reason I couldn’t honor his request, he said he understood. I didn’t want to make his job any more difficult.

Have you ever prayed (or wished) for something, and got it? Did it turn out the way you expected it would? Were you happy with the results? Can you relate to the chorus of the song Home (performed by Chris Daughtry)?

“Be careful what you wish for

You just might get it all

And some you don’t want

You just might get it all, yeah.”

The only thing I have any control of in my life in general are my own actions. For example, I can get mean and bitter over those in my workplace who disobey the rules, but in the end my incapacity to control the actions of others makes me the kind of employee no one wishes to be around because I’m hateful and sarcastic. This sounds like excellent advice for life in general in making things easier for you.