His Face

 “And to think, when their little eyes opened, the first thing they saw was the face of Jesus.” (Anonymous)

There are some clubs that it’s great to be a member of because you know that if you are not fully satisfied that you can stop using your membership any time you wish (like Sams or Costco Warehouse Clubs). There are some clubs that you inadvertently become a member of (whether you like it or not) because of a life experience. On June 25, 1994, my wife, Bobbi, and I became lifetime members of the Miscarriage Club with our first miscarriage. Seven miscarriages later we stopped being active members on February 22, 2002, and went into the status of supporting members.

Many of you know that we have one earthly daughter, Allena Desire’e that was born July 29, 1996. I would like to formerly introduce my eight other children that are waiting for me and Bobbi in Heaven. (I am sure of the number of children because I gave them all unisex names, and put the birth and death dates in my Bible. Bobbi was not able to do this at the time of each miscarriage so I did.) We don’t know the sex because the miscarriages always happened within the first trimester of my wife’s pregnancy.

·        Taylor Lee Kinker

·        Brook Lynn Kinker

·        Lou Diamond Kinker

·        Erin McKenzie Kinker

·        Carroll Reese Kinker

·        Laurel Hope Kinker

·        Bailey Glenn Kinker

·        Dorian Haley Kinker

During this period of time, I remember having a lot of anger towards God for allowing this to happen (and me not being able to stop the pain I saw in my wife’s after each miscarriage. Men need to be in control.) Though the woman gets most of the help in this situation (as it should be), remember that the man lost his child, too.  It’s interesting to note that Methotrexate was used to take care of a tubal pregnancy for Bobbi. It was also used seven years later in September 2009 as one of the chemicals that put my cancer in remission.

I would hope at this venture in my life that my life experiences have given me some measure of wisdom. About 15 years ago, I had a revelation about our miscarriages. Could it be this painful experience had been a way of God trusting and honoring me? My heavenly Father knew Bobbi and I would not waste this valuable experience to help other couples dealing with this. That’s exactly what we have tried to do. 

Romans 8:28 (VOICE) says:  We are confident that God is able to orchestrate everything to work toward something good and beautiful when we love Him and accept His invitation to live according to His plan. There’s no need to worry that God has no idea what He’s doing. Your heavenly Father knows your master plan, and is working it all out. You can trust Him with your life. (Below is a photo of my family during the latter half of our miscarriage journey with my maternal grandparents, Erma and Robert Eagle.)