Seeing Red

…Handling anger is an important topic. Anger is so common place that we often accept it as the normal. Practically every day we see people getting angry – in traffic, in stores, on security camera video clips on the news, in movies, and maybe even in our homes…[i]

I also recently read that Christian counselors report that 50% of people who come in for counseling have problems dealing with anger.  And a website I came across stated that over 60% of people lose their temper at least once per week.

So what do we do?  How can we not only overcome extreme bitterness in our heart? [It is the result of] being hurt or betrayed. [Can we] avoid losing our temper over all the daily things that agitate us? Below are five ways to begin looking at anger differently, and handling it in a way that pleases God.

1.  Remember God has a plan -Think about how God would have you handle the situation…Consider how He might be maturing you in your faith… 
 
    James 1:2-4 (ERV) “Let God do His job, instead of trying to do it for Him. When we have been hurt or wronged, we want the one who brought us pain, to feel pain themselves. We want to shun them, give them the silent treatment, or hurt them with words. We want to somehow get back at them for what they have done; after all, they deserve it.  But if there is one thing I know, God is a righteous and just God, and we can always trust that He knows what is going on and He will see to it that justice takes place.”

 

2.  Let Him do His job - When we have been hurt or wronged, we want the one who brought us pain to feel pain themselves…We want to somehow get back at them for what they have done…God is a righteous (and just God), and we can always trust that He knows what is going on…It’s not our job to seek vengeance…

Romans 12:19 (NIVUK) Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay.” says the Lord.

3. Talk it out (with Him, and others) - Talk to God about your feelings, and talk to someone you trust who can support in your desire to let your anger go.[ii]
    
    Ephesians 4:26-27 (RSV) “Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil.”

 

4. Change what you can change - Even if your mind wants to take revenge, talk to God about helping you have the willpower to offer forgiveness. It might not change the external problem, but it will change your internal ability to handle the situation. 
 
    Psalm 107:19-20 (TLB) “Then they cried to the Lord in their troubles, and He helped them and delivered them. He spoke, and they were healed—snatched from the door of death. “

 

5. Remember, God is your helper - God is always there to help us deal with our anger in the right way. 
    
    1 Corinthians 10:13 (VOICE) “Any temptation you face will be nothing new. But God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can handle. But He always provides a way of escape so that you will be able to endure and keep moving forward.”

 

If you have struggled with anger, in big ways or small ways, my prayer is that you will…focus on dealing with each situation…If you do not struggle with anger, the likelihood is that you know someone who does…Overcoming ungodly anger won’t happen overnight, but…it can happen…It takes twenty-one days [iii]for a habit to form. Today could be the [beginning of an important journey].[iv]

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[i] The phrase, “seeing red” involves bullfighting. The matador beckons the bull with a red cape, which agitates the bull as it charges for the cape. This cliché also deals with someone so angered that the anger controls the enraged person. Adapted from the Urban Dictionary

 

[ii] “Red is such an interesting color to correlate with emotion, because it's on both ends of the spectrum. On one end you have happiness, falling in love, infatuation with someone, passion, all that. On the other end, you've got obsession, jealousy, danger, fear, anger and frustration.” Taylor Swift quote

[iii] One popular claim is that a habit can be broken in only twenty-one days, an idea that seems to reference Psycho-Cybernetics, a 1960 self-help book written by cosmetic surgeon Maxwell Maltz. Other vernacular accounts vary from seventy-two hours to two weeks. But how long does it really take to break a habit? Google Answers

 

[iv] Adapted from the article, “5 Ways to Handle Anger In a Biblical Way” by Tracie Miles