Before

“If you cannot see where you are going, ask someone who has been there before.” (J. Loren Norris)

As an older adult, I have always felt that life is on big mentorship program. Everybody is a mentor (whether they intend to be or not) because someone (a mentee) is learning some life lesson by the way you live your life. What affect that life lesson has on the mentee is entirely up to you.

Officially, a mentor is an advisor (and role model) who is willing to invest in the mentee’s personal growth and professional development. The word “mentor” comes from the character "Mentor" in Homer's epic tale, The Odyssey. He was a trusted friend of Odysseus, the King of Ithaca. What makes a good mentor?

·       You motivate others by setting a good example.

·       You’re approachable and uncomplicated.

·       You’re committed to your mentee and the mentoring process.

·       You’re curious and inquisitive.

·       You’re willing (and able) to share your knowledge.

A mentee is someone who has identified a specific personal or professional goal that believes that the guidance and help of a mentor (and being held accountable to the mentor) can help them achieve their goal. The qualities of a good mentee include:

·       You can clearly communicate.

·       You have a positive attitude.

·       You have good time management skills.

·       You have initiative.

·       You have leadership capability.

·       You have respect for authority.

·       You’re a hard worker,

·       You’re driven to succeed.

·       You’re open to learning

Mentoring assumes that the person providing the insight is older, wiser and knows best. A mentor offers trusted advice based on experience. If you are being mentored you are likely to be interested in the implicit knowledge of your mentor and are voluntarily seeking their support.

Coaching assumes the coachee knows best. The coach is not there to offer you advice but to encourage you, the coachee, to work on the problem yourself. Coaching is more about an equal relationship, and doesn’t assume the coachee lacks knowledge or insight.

Discipling happens only in a religious context. It is training in regards to a person’s faith in Jesus. Discipleship encompasses all aspects of life, (including how one operates in the worlds of business, family, and church).

In your personal life, you should always be seeking to develop your abilities, continually learn new things, and challenge yourself on a regular basis. Here are the benefits of mentoring for personal development:

Exposure to new ways of thinking: For both mentee and mentor, the mentoring process exposes new ideas and reveals ways of thinking or problem solving. This can have long lasting effects on both people in the partnership by encouraging improvement.

Giving and receiving feedback: Feedback is something you should all want in order to improve, but probably don't ask for enough. Managers everywhere struggle with delivering feedback honestly and effectively. Mentoring helps people develop their relationship with feedback in a productive way.

Higher self awareness: Working out your goals with someone you look up to requires serious self-analysis around strengths, weaknesses, and values. As a result, those who have mentoring are more self aware than those who don’t – and self awareness is highly beneficial when it comes to career development.

Increased confidence: Whether it’s the ability to share ideas comfortably in meetings, or stand up for yourself in a challenging situation, people with mentors benefit from higher confidence in themselves. Mentors also experience an increase in self-confidence, as their mentee’s success reaffirms their abilities, which results in a confidence boost.

“One of the greatest values of mentors is the ability to see ahead what others cannot see, and to help them navigate a course to their destination.” (John C. Maxwell)[i]

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[i] Adapted from:

·       “5 Qualities of a Good Mentor” by Score

·       “Characteristics of a Good Mentee” by Together

·       “How mentoring can benefit personal development” by Elisa Nardi

·       “The mentor and mentee” by Institut of d’assurance

·       “The Powerful Benefits of Mentoring” by Nicola Cronin

·       “What is a Mentor and Roles of the Mentor and Mentee?”

·       “The Differences Between Coaching, Discipling, and Mentoring” by cchf.org