Oh, give me something refreshing to eat and quickly. [It could be] apricots, raisins, [or] anything. I’m about to faint with love. (Song of Solomon 2:5, the Message)
Solomon wrote the book during his reign as
king of Israel sometime between 971 and 931 BC. The Song of Solomon was written
early in his reign not merely because of the youthful exuberance of the poetry
but because his harem of 140 women (Song of Solomon 6:8) is relatively low in
number compared to the final tally of 1,000 (1 Kings 11:3).
Solomon mentioned location names from both the north and the south of the
country (including Lebanon and Egypt).
Song of Solomon takes its title from the
first verse of the book, which mentions who the song comes from. (Song of
Solomon 1:1). The original Hebrew version of the book took its title
from the book’s first two words “shiyr hashiyrim” translated as “the song of
songs.”
Song of Solomon is arranged by
character. Three parties join the song:
· The bride is a hard-working shepherd
girl with a rough home life. (Song of
Solomon 1:6)
· The bridegroom is a handsome and
stately shepherd. The text doesn’t explicitly say whether or not Solomon is
the bridegroom, but the bride does reference Solomon’s wedding parade. (Song of
Solomon 3:6–11)
· The chorus is a community of people
celebrating the bride and bridegroom’s love and union.
If this were indeed an arranged song, think
of it as a duet with a choir and this song has three general movements:
· The bride and groom prepare for the
wedding.
· The bride and groom profess their
desire for one another.
· The bride and groom are finally united.
The song culminates in the couple’s marriage
and mutual delight in one another. The bride is her bridegroom’s, and his
desire is for her. (Song of
Solomon 7:10)
In the Song of Solomon, God gave us a divine
manual on romantic relationships. It takes us from the initial attraction
between a couple through courtship, deepening intimacy, and marriage. What is
God’s desire and plan for husbands and wives? What are God’s love lessons from
the Song of Solomon? Here are four lessons from this book that reveal God’s
heart for marriage:
Love is beautiful: Song of Solomon is
a celebration of the beauty of the marriage relationship. “My beloved spoke and
said to me, ‘Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, come with me’” (Song of Solomon
2:10). The beauty of their relationship does not consist in physical outward
beauty, but rather in the inward beauty of character and in the spiritual
dimension of their relationship expressed in their commitment to God and his
design for marriage. Each sees the other person as a beautiful gift of God.
Like fine wine, beauty increases with age as God makes us more and more into
the image of Christ and makes us beautiful.
Love is exclusive: Sexual intimacy
between a husband and wife is a beautiful experience that expresses their
oneness and the love they have for one another. The Song of Solomon teaches
that love within marriage produces genuine sexual liberation—not liberation
from marriage, but liberation in marriage. The most explicitly erotic passage
in the entire book, Song of Solomon 7:1-8:4, depicts the vibrant sexual
intimacy of the man and the woman as a married couple. Here they enjoy the
fruit of their love: “I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me. Come,
my beloved . . . let us go early to the vineyards . . . there I will give you
my love.” (Song of Solomon 7:10-12)
Continuing the verbal
and physical foreplay, the man uses the images of a locked garden and a sealed
fountain to celebrate his beloved’s virginity. “You are a garden locked up, my
sister, my bride; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain” (Song of Solomon
4:12). The garden suggests privacy, separation, sacredness, and security. A
“sealed fountain” is protected; its water can only go to its rightful owner.
Sex without marriage cannot compare with the joy of giving yourself completely
to the beloved.
This language of
exclusivity is expressed in something like a marriage vow: “My beloved is mine
and I am his.” This phrase, often used by Jewish brides at weddings, is a
statement of possession. It represents an exclusive covenant between a man and
a woman who are saying to each other, “There is not much you can count on in
this world—health, money, career, looks—but you can count on me.
I will not give my
heart and body to anyone else in the way I give it to you.” Our culture
perpetuates several myths with regard to this biblical teaching of sexual
exclusiveness. One is that sex is such a powerful drive that it cannot be
controlled. In fact, we are called to honor God, ourselves, and our future
spouses by maintaining purity. Another myth is that sexual sin is unforgivable
sin. But God offers forgiveness for all our sins in the cross of Jesus Christ.
Through repentance and forgiveness we are offered a second chance to keep
covenant again.
Love is mutual: The two-way
conversation in this book is between a man and a woman who are deeply in love.
Each contributes to the relationship. Each desires the other. Their love is
reciprocal. Playfully, delightedly, the man and woman describe each other and
respond to these descriptions. They invite each other to enjoy and partake in
their love; nothing can stand in the way of its fulfillment.
And behind their
words is a deep desire to build each other up. The woman initiates the
conversation in this book and expresses her eagerness first: “Let him kiss me
with the kisses of his mouth . . . take me away with you—let us hurry!” (Song
of Solomon1:1, 4). We may think of women in the Middle East as being prudish,
silently hiding behind veils. But this woman has a level of desire and passion
every bit as powerful as the man’s. He is the focus of all her desire and
passionate longing. The man addresses her with a tender compliment, looking
past her own perceived flaws to praise her beauty.
Then he urges her to
follow the tracks of his sheep as she brings her young goats to a place where
they can be together, pointing to a place of common ground in the tending of
their flocks. It may be that opposites attract, but mutual enjoyment of shared
interests creates stability in a relationship. The joyous repartee of the
couple’s mutual admiration in Song of Solomon 1:15-2:3 signals their growing
intimacy. She calls him “beloved”; he reciprocates with “darling.” She
describes herself as a “rose of Sharon” and a “lily of the valley.” In those
days, both were common, everyday blossoms not especially noted for their
beauty. She is modestly saying, “I’m not so pretty—really kind of average.”
After which the man
lifts her up: to him she is like a lily among thorns; her beauty far outclasses
that of all others. She then repays his compliment with one of her own: compared
to all of the young men, he is like a refreshing apple tree that is far more
desirable than all the trees of the forest. This scene highlights an important
part of a healthy marriage: constructive conversation between a husband and a
wife. Compliments cultivate love, but criticism inhibits growth.
Love is total: Love is not just
physical. Love is a commitment of heart, mind, soul, and body. The Song reminds
us that the man and woman become one in every way, not just in the most obvious
physical way. The woman says, “This is my beloved, this is my friend” (Song of Solomon
5:16). The two share erotic love, but they also share hopes, dreams, and
aspirations as companions in life. Friendship is the foundation of biblical
love.
In one study, couples were asked to rank a
list of possible goals for their marriage. The single most important goal
listed was to have a friend in one’s partner. This should not be surprising.
God himself said, “It is not good for the man to be alone—I will make a helper
suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18). A spouse who is a real friend is a loyal
companion who “loves at all times” (Proverbs 17:17).This companionship is
expressed by the man, who calls his lover “my sister, my bride” (Song of Solomon
4:9). She is not just a lover, she is also a friend. This friendship, together
with the worship of God, is the foundation on which husbands and wives build
intimacy.
A
flood cannot put out love. Rivers cannot drown love. Would people despise
a man for giving everything he owns for love? (Song of Solomon
8:7, Easy-to-Read Version)[i]
[i] Adapted from:
· “Book of Song of Solomon Overview” by
Insight for Living Ministries
· “Love Lessons from the Song of Songs” by DANIEL KROEZE
· “Song of Solomon: delighting in love,
sex, and marriage” by Jeffrey Kranz
 |
| Artist rendering of King Solomon |
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