It is human nature to want to know
everything. Being in possession of knowledge is central to the way human beings
work and interpret the world around them. Many times humans find themselves in
a situation where they have incomplete information, which ultimately disrupts
their interpretation of reality.
Change is unavoidable (whether you like it or not) so is the
uncertainty that may follow. Uncertainty is that uncomfortable feeling when you
are no longer in familiar territory, but you don’t know what is ahead. The
good news is that uncertainty is a recognizable stage in the process of moving
from the familiar through the unknown to the next place you’re supposed to be.
As much as we try to avoid it, uncertainty is inevitable. Even
when a change has been expected, there may be a sense of letting something
go that may feel like a loss. Without the familiar to rely upon, you may feel
out of control. This uncertainty is viewed by most people as disruptive, and
they try to minimize indecision in their lives as much as possible.
Although humans do not have much
control over how things turn out, they have the power to come to terms with
uncertainty. Our
brains are hardwired to make much of modern life complicated. Our brains face
uncertainty with fear. How do you live with what you don’t
know? There
are proven strategies that you can use to improve the quality of your decisions
when your emotions are clouding your judgment. What follows are some of the
best strategies that successful people use in these moments:
Don’t let fear control your life- Fear is a loaded word. It expresses numerous emotions that
carry a lot of weight in your psyche. Even the idea of fear can make you uncomfortable
mentally, emotionally, psychologically, and physically. Fear is a normal
emotion, and an important protective mechanism. It’s what you emotionally
assign to it that makes it loom large in your thinking and feeling. It can stop
you from trying, changing, or achieving. If you choose to avoid fear at all
costs, you will deprive yourself of many enriching experiences.
Fear (of the unknown, of
uncertainty) that prevents you from fully living will keep you existing in the
same life year after year. You’ll feel safe and secure, but at what price?
Surround yourself with those who care about you and support you during times of
change and uncertainty. While you’re waiting for things to quiet down and
settle, reduce your stress by doing creative
projects and self-care.
Acknowledge your feelings, but learn
to tone them down to a realistic level. You can worry yourself sick over an
imagined outcome. Here’s a productive exercise. Imagine the worst possible
thing that could happen. Now imagine how you would manage to get through that.
If you can imagine how you’d react in the worst-case scenario, you can get
through the worst in reality.
Establish a daily routine- The habitual and familiar will help you feel more grounded
in your life even when things feel uncertain. Routines provide a safety net.
Something to help you feel your life is not in freefall. Create moments that
help you enjoy your life as it is. No sense sitting around terrified about the
future.
Stay positive and hopeful that somehow things
will work out even if you have no idea how that will happen. Life has
uncertainty that may take a long time to resolve. You cannot know how
everything is going to unfold. Even things you feel so sure of can change.
Being aware of the possibility that things can change can help you to cope if
things happen that you didn’t expect. This will help you be more resilient.
Practice
good habits-If
you’re dealing with uncertainty, you probably have stress in your body, even if
it’s not at the forefront of your thoughts at this exact moment. Over time,
that body stress affects blood pressure, blood sugar, muscle tension,
cholesterol level, breathing rate, and every organ in your body. Incorporate
stress reduction techniques into your day like meditation even if it is five to
ten minutes daily.
Meditation
is the best way to become more mindful. Finding your center will help you feel
better prepared to tackle whatever comes your way. Instead of noticing and
appreciating the beauty in the moment, you can get trapped in a fear-driven
thought cycle about the potential for future discomfort. Sometimes it helps to
take an inventory of what’s good in today. The future is beyond your control,
but you can spend today doing things like writing, reading, relaxing in the
sun, and connecting with the people you love. If ever you think you’ve created
a controllable, predictable life for yourself, you can rest assured that’s an
illusion.
Nothing
stays the same forever. Uncertainty can keep you up at night obsessing over
ways to protect yourself from anything that might go wrong. Or it can motivate
you to practice acceptance, live in the moment, and embrace the adventure of living.
What’s coming tomorrow might not be easy, or it might fulfill you in ways you
didn’t know to imagine. Today I’m focusing on my possibilities, not my fear,
and suddenly I feel a lot better.
Replace
expectations with plans-When
you form expectations, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. You can
guide your tomorrow, but you can’t control the exact outcome. If you expect the
worst, you’ll probably feel too closed-minded to notice and seize
opportunities. If you expect the best, you’ll create a vision that’s hard to
live up to. Instead of expecting the future to give you something specific,
focus on what you’ll do to create what you want to experience.
Speculation
leads to feelings, which can lead to more speculation and then more feelings.
It helps to stop the cycle by recognizing the feeling, and the reminding
yourself that you can’t possibly predict the future, but you can help create it
by fostering positive feelings about the possibilities. Oftentimes, we overlook
the little things we can do to make life easier while obsessing about the big
things we have no control over.
Suspend expectations- Having specific expectations of what should happen is not
realistic. When you expect a certain outcome, you are setting yourself up to be
frustrated and disappointed if things don’t work out the way you had hoped they
would. When you allow for many possibilities to happen, you prevent yourself
from staying attached to living life in a narrow way. As you open up to new
external possibilities, you open yourself up to exploring new aspects of
yourself.
Thoughts are simply things (neither
good nor bad), but are neutral things. It’s the emotions you attach to
your thoughts that determine how you’ll feel about how you’ll react. Often, you’re
programmed to feel a certain way; how you’ve seen significant others
express their emotions and react in certain situations may color how you learn
to feel and react. Some people see change and uncertainty as a challenge or an
opportunity and embrace that. Others see the same as a disaster and a
catastrophe to be avoided at all costs.
“Choosing to be curious is
choosing to be vulnerable because it requires us to surrender to uncertainty.
It wasn’t always a choice. We were born curious. But over time, we learn that
curiosity, like vulnerability, can lead to hurt. As a result, we turn to
self-protecting, choosing certainty over curiosity, armor over vulnerability,
and knowing over learning.” (Brené Brown)[i]
[i] Sources used:
·
“5 ways to deal with uncertainty” By Simon T. Bailey
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