Something Better

“Disappointments are just God's way of saying I've got something better:  be patient, live life, [and] have faith.” (Lanette Sem)

Because we’re human we’re inevitably going to experience disappointment. The disappointment can be an irritating feeling and other times it’s all consuming and bitter. How can you feel better immediately?
Disappointment is the feeling of displeasure caused by the non-fulfillment of one’s expectations. In this definition the issue lies with you. They need to change. You shouldn’t have to.

The problem with this thinking is that if that were the case then we’d have to wait for them to change before we could feel better, which could be never. The good news is that you have the capacity and power to change how you feel now. It’s never fun when it happens. As every bad mood has a remedy, disappointment does too. Below are five ways to overcome disappointments:

Don’t resist disappointment, but be willing to feel the emotion- Whatever you choose to feel don’t resist it, and try to go to Happyland. It’ll feel inauthentic and you’ll create even more pain and discomfort in the process. Just let it stay until it’s ready to go. When
you know your thoughts control it, you also know that you’re not going stay feeling this way forever. It won’t be a long season.

Find pleasure in the disappointment-Finding pleasure in disappointment is about strengthening your character. Pleasure is about satisfaction, and your satisfaction should be that you passed one massive character test that made you stronger. Nobody can share knowledge of “what if” if they haven’t survived that feeling. Always remember, it is all about balance. Nobody can be happy and full of joy all the time. There has to be moments of sadness and displeasure to test your capability of overcoming the bad feelings.

How do you want to feel?  If you know your thoughts are creating this disappointment (this non-fulfillment) of your expectations, do you want to feel that way? You get to decide. What kind of a person do you want to be? How does disappointment feel for you? Disappointment is part of the human experience. We’re supposed to feel it sometimes so that in times of joy we can appreciate it all the more because we know what disappointment feels like.

Identify what made you disappointed-Finding out what made you feel sad and troubled is the first step to disappointment’s remedy. The problem is the false expectation, but if you already find yourself caught in this line of thinking, you should see the reason for it. Someone hurt you emotionally, and that can cause enormous disappointment. It can be cured only if you consider what area in your faithfulness needs to be lowered. Of course there is a way and that could be to conclude the relationship. Consider the feeling gone once you realize what made you feel disappointed that way.

Look on the positive side-See the possibility and bright side in every disappointment, even if life is at its worst. By finding pleasure in the disappointment, we let goodness pass through. Every disappointment helps us become self-determined. By conquering the bad feelings, we have experience in navigating through bad times.

Lower your expectations-Expectations can lead to disappointments and that’s the only thing that made you feel sad. We introduce so many feelings and false expectations in one particular thing that not only will it make you sad, but it can make you sick. Since all the bad thoughts result in dysfunction of the body that can result in the breakdown of the immune system and viruses see the body as a playground. It is vital to expect less, because doing so can rarely lead you to sadness. 

Take responsibility for your thinking in all this- No one can make you feel anything. That’s your job. You create how you feel because of the thoughts you’re having. Take control of your power. You’re not feeling this way because someone else made you. You’re choosing to feel this way. Already you’ll start to feel better because you know that when you’re ready to feel better you can because you’re in charge of that.

Thought check-You’re feeling disappointment because of thoughts in your head. Let’s ask this question: “so what?” Figure out why this is an issue. We tend to make things mean all kinds of things. We have these ideas of the way others should behave.

We create these “rules” in our heads of what others need to do in order for us to feel a certain way, but the truth of the matter is, people can do whatever they want…and it doesn’t have to mean anything about us. We get into trouble when we create meanings for other’s behaviors, and how we interpret them.

 “What do you do when disappointment comes? When it weighs on you like a rock, you can either let it press you down until you become discouraged, even devastated, or you can use it as a stepping-stone to better things.” (Joyce Meyer)[i]

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[i] Sources used:

·        “5 Ways to Overcome Disappointments” by Nikola Gjakovski

·        “Disappointment – 5 Things You Can Do To Feel Better Now” By Hannah