Friday, October 27, 2017

Scared Silly

Do one thing every day that scares you. Those small things that make us uncomfortable help us build courage to do the work we do.” (Eleanor Roosevelt)

Any time someone steps out of their area of familiarity. Personal growth is the result. Why would anyone want to be anxious by doing something they fear? Pushing through doubts makes us regret less and builds confidence, which makes us feel more confident about ourselves.

 
Take this challenge. Make a list of a few things that scare you. They can be both large and small, but think how you can come out of your comfort zone. Once you have the list created; choose a week that you can start to do the items on your list.

 
You can choose to do one every day or one a month. It’s whatever you wish. What’s important is that you are setting an intention to achieve what you fear and following through. By doing this, you will feel empowered, more confident, increase your capacity to take risks, and you open yourself to new opportunities. Here are some lessons to learn:

 

1.   Change your attitude about fear: Think back to the last time you did something really scary.  Did it seem that scary after it was over? That situation goes for all fear. It goes away once you’ve actually done it.  It just drifts away because the reality isn’t as scary as the fantasy happening inside your head.

Whatever you’re thinking about doing will be exactly the same.  You’ll feel scared before doing it, but feel better once it’s over.  If you don’t do it, that fear will always be with you.  Do it now and let the fear fall away later.

2.   Distance yourself from how crazy you think it is: One mental trick that works well for me is to distance myself from the crazy thing I want to do. That can help prevent you from getting too into the moment and psyching yourself out. Approach it as if you’re another person. 

See yourself as an observer of the situation almost as if you’re watching yourself.  The main idea is to just get outside of your head and dissociate yourself from what’s going on.  By disengaging with the situation, it won’t seem as scary.

3.   Get pumped up to do it: Fear isn’t the only feeling you’ll get when you think about trying something crazy; it can also feel exciting.  Too often the fear overrides those feelings keeping you from actually doing it. Pump yourself up. 

Get so excited that fear is diminished in size.  When you feel that exciting energy surging inside you, you’ll get the motivation to get yourself going, and you’ll think less about the fears you might have.

4.   Minimize thinking once you’ve decided to do it: Fear is an expectation of what might happen in the future if we take a certain course of action.  Because we don’t know what will happen on the scary path, the uncertainty can feed our fears and make us envision all the potential bad things that might happen.  It’s easy to get lost in these thoughts and psych yourself out before you even take the first step.

Train your brain to ignore these thoughts. When you’re mind starts racing, calm it down and get back to reality. Many of the fears you’ll focus on will be nothing but your imagination going wild.  It’s good to be aware of all the potential dangers, but you can’t dwell on them.

5.   Scary things equal growth: Remind yourself that the biggest moments of growth happen when you do something scary. It’s always scariest the moment you move away from your comfort zone, and try something completely different. Sticking to the safe and familiar will assure that you continue to see the same results in your life. 

By moving away from the norm and facing down those fears, you’ll get places you’ve never been before.  To get somewhere you’ve never been; you have to do things you’ve never done.

6.   Start small, aim big: Let’s say that you want to skydive. It might be too scary an idea to immediately hop on a plane, go to 16,000 feet and parachute out. You might be jumping the gun a little. That’s why skydiving places have a period of preparation and training involved before you even step into a plane. 

They know it’s important to build up to that big moment. It’s okay to start off with small, steady steps to reach one big scary goal. By taking it in small, more manageable chunks, you’ll find it’s easier to keep pushing yourself to the end.  All that matters is that you’re moving forward to something that you ultimately want to do.

“Don’t fear failure. Fear being in the exact same place next year as you are today.” (Anonymous)[i]




[i] Sources used:

·        “6 Tips to Do Crazy Things that Scare You” by Steve Bloom

·        “Do What Scares You” (http://www.virtuesforlife.com/do-what-scares-you/)
 

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