Her name was never
revealed, and yet she may have the worst reputation of a woman in the Bible.
It's difficult to find a book (or sermon treatment) of the life of Job that
doesn't include the usual condemnations toward his wife.
It has become a
standard joke to pity Job (as if his wife was yet another cross God called this
man to bear). She shares space in the Hall of Shame with the likes of Jezebel,
Delilah,
and Michal.
Is this image an honest assessment of her character?
Although clearly Job
is the main character, he is not the only one. She may not have been the
primary subject of the cosmic argument between God and Satan, but she was still
caught in the crossfire. You might argue that every hardship endured by Job was
similarly felt by his wife:
She watched her
children die. Ten lives nurtured to love, honor, and respect Jehovah. (Likely,
Job's wife played a part in that.) It's unlikely he could be such an esteemed
man in society if his wife was not an integral and influential leader in her
own right.
Imagine the grief
that overwhelmed her soul as she looked down in disbelief at ten freshly dug
graves. She experienced dramatic financial loss. The Bible describes Job as a
wealthy man, perhaps the richest in the world (at that time). Undoubtedly his
wife was accustomed to a lifestyle of luxury and comfort. Her children likely
had everything they needed.
On one really bad
day, she lost it all her wealth, property, and way of life. She was not only
bankrupt, but homeless, forced to beg outside the city dump. She became a
caretaker for her disease-ravaged husband. It distorted Job's appearance so
dramatically that his closest friends could barely recognize him.
Every day Job spent
at the ragged edge of death; only experiencing momentary relief brought by the
heat of the burn piles and the scrape of pottery shards. While we weep with
Job, we miss the faithful, steady presence of his wife. Imagine the exhausting
drain, caring for a suffering soul like Job. Imagine the loud howls of agony,
hour after hour, day after day. Imagine the one you love walking the thin line
of sanity, suffering excruciating, debilitating pain.
Job's wife continued
this mission of mercy without the resources of a helpful support network,
without any financial resources, without relief. Their children were gone,
their friends and family scattered, her God seemingly absent.
We come back to those
seemingly bitter words of resignation (the only recorded words of Job's wife in
the entire story). “Are you still trying to be godly when God has done all this
to you? Curse him and die.”[ii]
These are tough words
that appear to reflect a heart bitter and angry toward God. Many question her
faith, wondering if perhaps her faith in Jehovah wasn't real. Every human has
moments, words, thoughts we'd love to take back. They were shared in the
crucible of a crushing trial. Imagine your ill-thought words were recorded in
history for everyone to dissect (and analyze).
How fair is it to
define an entire life based on one conversation. Nowhere before (or after this)
incident are we given any indication that Job's wife was a perpetually bitter,
unhappy woman.
Perhaps her advice to
Job wasn't born out of her own misery, but out of compassion. Day after day,
she witnessed her husband live out his time in utter agony (with no relief in
sight).
Maybe she was seeking
the most compassionate way out for Job. Curse God, and get it over with.
Perhaps she longed to see an end to Job's suffering (a painless journey to the
sweet relief of Heaven).
It's not uncommon to
find raw, honest, expressions of grief spilled on the pages of the Bible. Yet
we celebrate David, Moses, Jeremiah, and even Job as being authentic and
honest, but heap judgment on Job's wife for similar expressions.
I imagine Job lifts
his blistered hand, and strokes her hair. At first, his words read like a harsh
rebuke: “You’re talking like an empty-headed fool. We take the good days from
God; why not also the bad days?”[iii]
You might read these
words like this: “Sweetheart, that's not you talking. Let's remember God's
promises. Let's remember his goodness.” Such a far cry from the ringing
condemnation she's received in the centuries since. In fact, seeing the pain in
her eyes may have added to Job's great suffering.
It's likely she was
in a state of shock. Sudden loss has a way of clouding our judgment, distorting
our view of reality, and of God. Today we might even conclude Job's wife
suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Job's words were the balm
his wife needed to soothe her soul. She isn't heard from again in the remaining
chapters of the story.
All we know of God's
treatment of Job's wife is how he blessed her after the trial was over. She
shared in the doubling of their wealth. She had the privilege of giving birth
to ten more children, whom the Scriptures declared the most beautiful in all of
the land.[iv]
It's likely she
shared in the many more fruitful years of her husband's life. The Scriptures
say that Job lived long enough to see four generations of his offspring.
So what can we learn
from Job's wife today? Perhaps her greatest testimony is her simple presence
during her husband's lowest moments. Every single day, there was his wife,
caring, loving, and enduring the trials Satan inflicted (on both of them).[v]
The trials that would
split many marriages apart didn't separate Job and his wife. They stuck it out
together. Was her attitude perfect throughout the storm that engulfed her
family? No. Did she say things she would later regret? Absolutely! But through
it all, she endured. Her faith in God remained intact. Her service to her
husband should be held up as a model of biblical character.[vi]
[v] For a modernized fictional version of this story, see
the chapter entitled “The Test,” from the book, All for One, by Robert Kinker. For a fictional book of this time
period, please see Job’s Wife by Jean
Shaw. (I have not read this book.)
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