If
you…have [ever] been involved in some sort of accountability group no doubt
the subject of lust
has come up. In my conversations
with other men we talk about this often. Usually the conversation focuses
on three things: [i]
1. What
is lust?
2. How do I
not lust?
3. What do
I do when I lust?
…[I'd] rather just focus on the second question [above]… More
specifically, How do I look and not lust[ii]…I would like to clarify what lust is and isn't: Lust is
not looking. [It] is letting your
mind wander to sexual thoughts after looking. [iii]
You
see, lust is not this thing that just happens. It's not spontaneous. It's
not random. Lust grows. It's in many ways organic. And it has its own
lifecycle.
So
when you or I look at an attractive person, we aren't lusting... but it's
at that moment when the lifecycle can start to unfold. So, with that being
said, here are three things you can do to make sure your looks don't turn
into lust…
v Count your looks
– “Look once, you're human; look
twice, you're a man; look three times, you [are just being disrespectful]…”If
you keep glancing…chances are you aren't doing it because you admire that
individual for their personality. Most likely you're [getting]…pleasure
from what you see…
This
is a discipline and it takes practice…If you are conscious of how many
times you eye up someone, you'll also be more aware of the [that] when the
lust monster starts knocking at your door…
v Follow up your look with an action - When you see that…lady jogging by in her form-fitting
shorts and top, don't just look, and let your thoughts get taken over by
something unhealthy. Be more intentional. This is what the Bible means when
it says to take your thoughts captive. [iv]
Maybe
pray for her…or think about how that woman is someone's daughter or wife
and deserves respect, not objectification…Recognize that a moment of
decision has arrived and you are deciding not to lust but rather to think
about something else. Remember, lust has to grow. You can kill that growth
with some solid intentionality… [v]
v Give glory to God -
Give glory to God for the [attractive] jogger I just saw…You glorify God
for what happened in church on Sunday…[or] for the promotion you just got…[or]
for the beautiful sunset you just witnessed…
You can glorify God for creating the beautiful jogger
who just ran by. [vi] Don't…think it's impossible to see an attractive person
and [just] appreciate their beauty…Looking is not lusting. [It] doesn't just happen; it's cultivated.
Next time you see someone who [you are attracted to]
take a minute and say, "Thank
you God for creating that person." Then, move along and
continue with your day…You will always see beautiful people... sometimes
wearing clothes that leave less to the imagination…
v Lusting isn't inevitable, [but it] is a choice - You can stop lust by killing it at the root. So next
time you see someone who's looking good, remember these three steps:
1.
Count the looks.
2.
Be intentional with your thoughts
3. Say "Thank
you Jesus."
If you do these three things and go about your day, you
will halt lust in its tracks. Because the "battle of lust" begins
where it dies ... in your mind. [vii]
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