Word Deafness*

Have you ever been verbally abused in person (or via Facebook) by someone who professes to care about you? (Proverbs 25:18) You are not hearing-impaired to all the loud, hateful angry insults that is being unloaded on your ears, and hurled at your fragile ego. (It matters little whether you felt the comments were deserved or not.)

This kind of action confuses the recipient. Their self-worth is in question. Don’t you deserve better than this? Proverbs 29:20 (NLT) makes this observation about the verbal mistreatment I just described. “There is more hope for a fool than for someone who speaks without thinking.”  Before deciding what needs to be said, ask the acronym T.H.I.N.K first.

1.  Is it True? Most people do not purposely intend to be dishonest. Other people are hurt when someone else seeks to put themselves above others (in any way that’s needed). “Liars hate their victims; flatterers sabotage trust.” (Proverbs 26:28, MSG)

2.  Is it Helpful? Take this challenge in the near future for a week, and see if it changes you. Be aware of Jesus presence. Avoid saying (or writing) anything that you would be unwilling to communicate to Him face-to-face. “Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word a gift.” (Ephesians 4:29, MSG)

In Matt Maher’s song, “All the People Said Amen,” the following admission is made:

You are not alone, if you are lonely
If you feeling frail, you're not the only
We are all the same, in need of mercy, to be forgiven and be free It's all you got to lean on but thank God it's all you need

If your rich or poor, well it don't matter
Weak or strong, we know love is what we're after
We're all broken but we're all in this together
God knows we stumble and fall
And he so loved the world he sent his son to save us all

3.  Is it Instructional? Wise people help others to also become more knowledgeable. Gaining more wisdom is one of their favorite things.  “But if you correct those who care about life, that’s different – they’ll love you for it! Save your breath for the wise – they’ll be wiser for it; tell good people what you know – they’ll profit from it.” (Proverbs 9:8-9, MSG)

4.  Is it Necessary? At times, silence can be the best thing to do in a heated disagreement. Don’t jump into a conversation unless you’re invited to because you can often mishear the wrong words at the worst possible time. “Watch your words and hold your tongue; you’ll save yourself a lot of grief.” (Proverbs 21:23, MSG)

In the movie, The Wizard of Oz, Dorothy questioned the Scarecrow about his non-existent brain capacity. His response was the following: “Some people without brains do an awful lot of talking.”

5.  Is it Kind? Many people know that high quality dark chocolate (in moderation) can be nourishing, a potent source of antioxidants, decreases blood pressure, and helps prevent against heart disease.  Who in your life is ravenous for your kind words (or the special taste of dark chocolate only you can give with what you say).

Luke 6:45 (NLT) provides this important foundation for an individual who struggles with verbal anger. “A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart.  What you say flows from what is in your heart.”

Maybe it’s time to unburden the scary hidden stuff deep in your heart (through good counseling) so you can finally turn into that person you’ve always wished you could be. I have confidence that you can become the best version of yourself possible.

*A form of aphasia that is the result of brain damage (of some kind). With this illness is a partial (or total) inability to verbalize thoughts in a manner that is understandable to others.

**Inspired by the sermon “The Choose Wisely Series: Wise Words,” Installment One, Pastor Dave Jansen, September 4, 2016, CenterPoint Church Gahanna, Gahanna, OH