Open Mouth and Insert Foot

In the workplace, I try to ignore a lot of the idle chit-chat around me. I give my co-workers the benefit of the 99% of the time. The only time I don’t do that is when comments that are being said are unkind (or unfair) about a group of people (because of their race, sexual identity, handicap of some kind, nationality, or gender).

At my 9am break, there were two other people in the employee lounge besides me. The two other people in the room (according to their nametags were “Cleo S.” and “Mabel W.” We were all watching the Queen Latifah Show (QL). QL was interviewing a well-known male gay actor in the sit-com arena. This actor said he had even gotten the opportunity to throw out the first ball in a baseball game.

Before I realized what was happening, Cleo had gotten up to change the TV station, but not before he made the following comments (or something like this): “I’m not going to watch that gay man. If I was at the stadium, I would have booed him.”

I could tell Cleo wanted to engage me in his conversation. Instead I chose to become preoccupied with my cell phone. I was wondering if I’d actually heard what I thought I heard. I was certain.

I knew that if I lifted my head the angry, red-faced, out-of-control Robert would come out yelling (for the entire store to hear), “Shut up, you bigot.” When my morning break was over, I chose to report Cleo’s words to the proper store authority. They were not surprised when Cleo’s name was mentioned as the offender.  

I was also asked if I was aware of the store’s 0% policy on this kind of harassment language. I replied that I was. This kind of communication was a shock to me since I rarely heard it. It had given me no joy to turn Cleo in, but I knew I had to. It was important for him to learn this kind of talk had to cease at work.

As I did my duties later that morning there were several other things that came to mind. Was Cleo aware of QL’s sexual identity? Why would he be concerned with a homosexual guest when the host of the show was rumored a lesbian? My guess was that he was unaware of this information.

I don’t believe in any way Cleo was prejudice. This homosexual male was effeminate in the way he was speaking. Unfortunately, some homosexual men can be effeminate in the way they talk and act at times. Homosexual and effeminate often become linked together. It shouldn’t be that way, but only the gay community can change that public perception.

Even though Cleo didn’t state it properly, his problem seemed to be with effeminate men, and not the gay male community. Many people like Cleo need to learn to keep their opinion inside their head instead voicing their intolerant view to everybody around them.

Technically, Cleo said nothing that could really be deemed horrendous. What was awful was the derogatory manner the words were said in. I’m not sure what will happen once the “wheels of justice” start running. I hoped Cleo was only reprimanded, and didn’t lose his job.

Life is not always pleasant. Sometimes you have to step up and do the stuff that leaves a sour taste in your mouth. Just remember when you step up, and do the right thing (no matter the cost) you create a better world for everyone else.  

Maybe you will be the person to cause a possible offender to think hard before he (or she) does something that will cross the line of what’s right (and what’s wrong). That’s something to be proud of. Give yourself a pat on the back (if you are that limber).