Do you feel things more deeply than others seem to? Do
you ever need to just withdraw and be alone? If so, you might be a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). This is
someone who experiences
sharp physical, mental, or emotional responses to stimuli. This can include external stimuli like your surroundings and
the people you’re with, or internal stimuli, like your own thoughts, emotions
and realizations. It’s remarked on by others with comments like, “You noticed
that?” “Why does that bother you?” “It doesn’t seem that bad.” or “You’re too
sensitive.”
Being a HSP is a normal trait. Approximately 15 to
20 percent of the population has the gene that makes them HSP. HSP is a real, research-based
characteristic. In psychology, anyone who tests as having
a very high degree of Sensory Processing Sensitivity (SPS), a personality
trait, is considered HSP. SPS is the trait of deeply processing experiences and
stimuli, and a person with high SPS has differences at the neural level.
Being a HSP comes with both advantages and disadvantages. HSP
tend to be empathetic, artistically creative, intuitive, and highly aware of
the needs of others so much so that many thrive in careers as therapists, counselors,
artists, musicians, and writers. HSP get exhausted, and sense the emotional
cues of the people around them. Loud, crowded, or visually busy spaces can
overwhelm HSP (any strong sensory input can). Because of their need to spend time alone, HSP are often
confused with introverts. The truth is that anyone can be highly
sensitive whether introverted, extroverted, or anywhere in between.
If you are a HSP, the world desperately needs more people like you:
·
HSP help those around them process
their emotions (and get their needs met). Is it possible that HSP play a vital role
serving as the “emotional processor” for the rest of the group? HSPs serve as
sounding boards, they build up their friends with encouragement, they react
sincerely and empathetically to struggles, and they help see connections you
wouldn’t have seen on your own. Your sensitivity is your greatest trait.
·
HSPs offer cooperative and compassionate leadership.
While many HSPs dislike the
competitive nature of the business world, others are actively working to change
it. Sensitive leaders tend to listen more to their team, clearly express
the reasons for their
decisions, and pay attention to the strengths and preferences of those they
work with. They are big on encouraging words and building compromise. They
allow employees to vent when needed without reprimand. HSP may be in the minority, but they
might be the best leaders (and bosses) you’ll ever have.
·
HSPs see shades of emotion that no one else sees
(and use them to enrich the world). Most people might not think
they can relate to HSP, but chances are good that their favorite songs, paintings,
and stories were created by HSP. HSPs are endowed with the power to reach into the world of
feelings and dreams, and distill them as eye-opening moments for others.
Everyone
has different things that irritate them to varying degrees. If you're a HSP, you might notice that many of the following items below have
always aggravated you:
·
Bright lights-It
might sound silly to be annoyed by lighting, and yet light can be huge triggers
for HSP. You might find that you're extra affected by strong lights, which can
seem way too bright. You're tuned into your surroundings, and as a result feel
easily over-stimulated.
·
Criticism-HSP
feels annoyed by criticism (not because they don't want to hear someone's
opinion, or that they don't find advice valuable). Their feelings get hurt
easily. This might be because HSP feel much deeper than others tend to. If this
happens to be you, it'll be important to establish
boundaries with others
and "protect your energy." Practice hearing criticism without taking
it personally.
·
Crowded places-While
some people thrive in busy environments, a HSP will find them to be utterly
annoying and overwhelming. Think along the lines of crowded parties, loud
concerts, or busy streets. They are unable to handle this for long periods of
time without options to retreat. This is may explain why HSP require more
downtime, or consider themselves an
introvert at heart.
·
Faint background noises-Like
the sound of someone chewing, most people barely notice repetitive background
noises such as the sound of a ticking clock. If you're a HSP, things like this
can drive you crazy. This one is torture because it just doesn’t stop.
Repetitive sounds are like nails on a chalkboard. It can be highly distracting.
·
Loud chewing-If
you're easily annoyed by the sound of someone
chewing,
swallowing audibly, or slurping a drink, it might feel like you're
overreacting. And yet this is something many HSP struggle with. The slow
chomp-chomp-chomp of a coworker at lunch can be hard to tune out. HSP hear
every slurp and lip smack. Since HSP is sensitive to subtleties in their
environment, they may more easily notice things in a room that are out of place
or people chewing loudly.
·
Negative news stories-HSP
might find the news to be upsetting particularly when it’s negative because HSP
have a hard time disengaging. Instead of watching and separating your feelings
from what's happening on screen, HSP get sucked in, feel angry, sad, or annoyed
as a result. HSP are often much happier when they turn it all
off, and take a break from media. If you find
that you're feeling annoyed, don't be afraid to tune out for a while and give
yourself a chance to rejuvenate.
·
Rude social interactions-Throughout the day, we all witness people who fail to hold
open doors, say hello, or stand politely in busy lines. It's annoying for
everyone, but for HSP these social interactions can be dreadful. HSP have the
gift of thoughtfulness. They consider how actions impact environment. It's
annoying when people behave in a way that serves them, but is inconvenient or
harmful to others.
·
Sensitivity to jokes-Nobody
likes to be the punch line of a joke. HSP might read into even the most
lighthearted joking. And this goes for witnessing it happen to other people,
too. HSP's amazing empathy causes them to consider a words' impact on others.
If someone tells a joke at someone else's expense, they'll be able to imagine
how hurtful that is. HSPs are more likely to be annoyed by this than think it's
funny. It's important to recognize this in yourself. While you don't have to
hang around people who make you uncomfortable, it can help to recognize when
someone is just trying to have fun.
·
Strong smells-If
you find that you're completely overwhelmed by
strong scents (whether it's someone's perfume, a
powerful household cleaner, or a particularly pungent room spray) you might be
a HSP. HSP senses are strong: smell, touch, audio, tactile, and even emotional
sensitivities. It can help to avoid these scents, perhaps by asking those
around you to not overdo it. HSP might avoid use of harsh cleaners or heavy
perfumes.
·
Unexpected loud noises-If
you're a HSP, you may find that unexpected loud noises (like cars honking)
startle you to an extreme degree. If they're happening in the background
repeatedly, you might find that you can't ignore them. The sensory system of
the HSP is tightly wound up. There is no preparation for that sensory onslaught,
and the reaction is anger. It causes anxiety in many people with these
sensitivities.
·
Unrealistic expectations-If you're a HSP, unrealistic expectations (such as a full
social calendar, or a tight deadline at work) can feel completely overwhelming,
frustrating, and upsetting due to the way you think and react to stimuli. HSPs
prefer to approach tasks methodically and reflect more deeply before
responding. Their nervous system may also be more likely to feel physiological
responses to stress when overstimulated.
“Many highly sensitive people need to excuse themselves
from demanding environments, often having a ‘refuge’ where they can be alone
and ‘ground’ their reactions.” (Highly Sensitive Refuge)[i]
[i] Sources used:
·
“19 Habits of Highly Sensitive
People” by Lauren Valko
·
“If You're Easily Annoyed By These 11 Things, You
Might Be A Highly Sensitive Person” By
Carolyn Steber
·
“What Is a
Highly Sensitive Person? (A Relatable Guide)” by Highly Sensitive Refuge
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