In
the age of Google, answers are the easy part of the equation. You can look up
virtually anything on the Internet, and get an instantaneous answer. Are you asking
the right questions of the correct source for a factual response, an expert opinion, or a well-reasoned conclusion?
You have to ask questions in a manner that gets the best possible reply. Asking
remarkable questions is a learned skill that takes practice. The key to success
is less about having the right answers and more about having the right questions. Here are four
guidelines for improving on the skill of asking questions.
Dig Deeper- Always
consider using follow-up questions. Unless you are looking strictly for the
facts, there is some sort of assumption in the answer the person gives you. Ask
them a follow up question such as, “What makes you say that?” or “Why do you
think that?” Let’s say that you are talking to a co-worker and need to know
details of a project. Your co-worker tells you that one of the suppliers has
been very difficult to work on the project.
You will want to follow up on that comment. A
question such as “What do you mean he is difficult to work with?” will lead you
to the real facts. It may not be because the supplier is particularly difficult
to work with, but rather is not reachable for quick communications or any
number of outside reasons. Follow up questions give you insight and let you
make your own opinions about things. Avoid the temptation to comment on every
question.
Sometimes I like to see how many questions I
can ask in a row without commenting. It’s amazing what you can learn when
you do this.
It makes your comments or decisions much more informed. Often you don’t get to
the real meat of an issue until you’ve gone several questions deep.
Don’t Ask Yes or No
Questions-Questions you can answer “yes” or “no” are closed-ended.
They don’t generate discussion and they rarely yield any insight. Instead, ask
an open-ended question. By doing this, you get insights you might not have
known existed. Questions with “would,” “should,” “is,” “are,” and “do you
think” all lead to yes or no. Questions with “who,” “what,” “where,” “when,”
“how,” or “why” lead to people giving some thought to their answers and
providing more information. For example, instead of asking, “Are you happy with
your results?” you might ask, “Why do you think you got the results you did?”
The first question can only be answered “yes” or “no.” The second question
invites reflection and starts a discussion.
Get both
sides of the story-It is so easy to hear one side of the
story, act on the information, and then be embarrassed when you find out that
you only had half the facts. I constantly remind myself, “There
are at least two sides to every story.” One of the best ways to
mentor others is to ask rather than tell.
Yes, you can preach to your subordinates, but your insights will not be as
meaningful to them as they are to you.
You can accomplish far more by leading them
with good questions. One of my favorites, especially in the wake of a mistake
or disappointment, is this: “What can we learn from this experience that might
be useful to us in the future?” A former boss told me, “Make sure you tell me
what you know and what you think you know, and make sure I know the
difference.” Often you will have to ask, “Do you know that to be a fact?” If
so, “How do you know?” or “Can you provide me with the source for that
statistic or claim?”
When you are asking questions, take
notes.
It communicates tremendous respect for the person you are interviewing. It is
also very helpful when things get quiet. You can go back over your notes and
discover new questions you haven’t yet thought about or asked. Every business
decision is based on assumptions. If you don’t understand these assumptions,
you may make a bad decision. It’s often helpful to ask yourself first and then
your colleagues, “What are we assuming in this scenario?”
The Power of
Silence-Get comfortable
with asking questions, waiting for a response, listening to the response, and
then waiting some more. Many times the person you are questioning has more
information, and will bring it out when you wait for it. You have to be
comfortable with that silent period before the information comes to you. Police
and military interrogators use silence very effectively. Don’t interrupt the
person with whom you are talking.
First, it tells the person you
don’t value what they are saying. Interrupting stops their train of thought and
directs the conversation the way you want, and not necessarily the way it
should go. Ask your question, and then let the person answer it in full even
when you think you are not getting the answer you want. If time is of the
essence and the person has long strayed from the topic, then of course you need
to interrupt. Be as polite as possible when doing it. This shows the person
that you do respect what they are saying.
Say something like, “Excuse me, I
want to make sure I understand you. What I heard you say is…” and then bring
them back on point to the matter at hand. Most people get uncomfortable when
things get quiet. They feel the obligation to fill the space with chatter. You
can let this work to your advantage by just keeping your lips locked and your
ears open. When you do, you will often find that people volunteer amazing
amounts of information that you would have never obtained any other way.
“One of the best questions
you can ask when something negative happens is this: ‘What does this experience
make possible?’”
(Michael Hyatt)[i]
[i] Sources used:
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