Saturday, March 17, 2018

Calm

“Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever even if your whole world seems upset. “ (Saint Francis de Sales)

 Peace is one of the most important human experiences. If you don't have peace, then you're not able to appreciate whatever else you do have. How do you find peace of mind? It's a question often asked, but sometimes  rarely answered in a satisfying way. Some say peace of mind lies in security, finding calmness in life, or acceptance and letting go.

 Your life is always changing. It can be difficult at times, too. People will say and do things that upset you. That's just the nature of finding true peace. Hang onto your integrity no matter what is happening in your world. No matter how tough things get. You can always choose to  have that amazing sense of peace within you. But it takes some practice to really start to feel it. Here are some guidelines to help you nurture a sense of peace:

 

1. Know your ideal self: Make a list of all the good qualities you intend to cultivate. Are you going to be kinder, fairer, more tolerant, more generous, more patient, more dignified? What are your responses to difficulties going to be? What principles do you wish to uphold?


 

2. Do the next right thing.: If you've been struggling with your emotional or mental state like, it may be difficult, at first, to act with integrity all the time. You may find yourself making mistakes and sometimes behaving in a less than ideal way. In order to build up a habit of sticking to your principles, just practice doing the “next right thing” all the time.


 


3. Let go of perfectionism: I could have made my life a lot easier if I had validated the attempts I was making to do the right thing even when things were a struggle. Instead, I beat myself up and made myself feel worse because I was angry with myself for not living right. It's all a journey. Be imperfect, and still make progress.


4. Make amends immediately: If for some reason you end up treating someone unfairly or unkindly, or doing something dishonest or mean, make amends for it as soon as you can. Don't wait. Correct your mistakes as soon as possible and you can find peace of mind in the fact that you have improved upon your actions and done your part to relieve any ill feeling or guilt.


 


5. Practice patience: Other people around you may not be living in the same way that you have chosen to. It doesn't matter; they will have their conscience to live with at the end of the day, and you will have yours. Choose to respond in a way that will give you peace of mind. Take a deep breath before reacting to people who push your buttons.


 


6. Let your head and heart support you: You won't have a peaceful mind if you allow negativity to dominate your thinking. Try to understand others rather than judging them. Forgive others and you free yourself. Radiate compassion and be a good Samaritan. Not only will others benefit; you'll also add to your own sense of self-esteem.


 


7. Think long term: It may be tempting to lose your rage when you're feeling angry or frustrated. But think about how you will feel about yourself and your own actions later on. Will you be happy about your behavior? Will it lead to you feeling peace of mind? If not, don't do it.


 


8. Validate yourself: You will not get to feel that lovely sense of peace if you don't take the time to fully acknowledge it. In difficult situations, look at what you did well. Have you been struggling? Notice when you make progress. At the end of each day, summarize to yourself how you've acted well and kept your integrity. What helps you feel at peace with yourself?

 If there's no inner peace, people can't give it to you. The husband [or wife] can't give it to you. Your children can't give it to you. You have to give it to you.” (Linda Evans)[i]




[i] Sources used:
·       “8 Things to Do If You Want to Be at Peace with Yourself “by Beth Burgess
·        “Eckhart Tolle: Why You Aren't At Peace Right Now” as told to Leigh Newman
 
Inspired by: Netflix The World's Most Extraordinary Homes
 

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