1. Friends
make time for each other: Nothing makes
closeness fade away faster than never seeing each other. While some friendships
may be strong enough to span long times apart, most aren’t. Invest real time
with a select group of close friends who are willing to make time for you also.
When you are on the receiving end of this gesture, it can help brighten a
stressful day.
“The language of
friendship is not words but meanings.” (Henry David Thoreau)
2. Friends
value Honesty, dependability, and loyalty in their friendships: Don’t
lie, and then be caught in an untruth. Allow your friendship to grow by being dependable.
Remind them that you’re friends for life by reminding them of your constant
presence.
There’s no universal method to being caring
without being too pushy. You’ve got to figure out what works best and adjust as
needed for that individual. Some people are good at hiding their negative
emotions behinds masks. A good friend knows the real you in a variety of
circumstances.
If they’ve developed a bad habit, then point
it out, and show you’re concerned. If you feel like criticisms are harsh, offer
them tips on how to improve. One of the benefits of true friendship is being
able to share feelings and validate each other’s feelings.
When you say you’ll do something, be a person
that sticks to your word. That means being punctual, not going back on your
promises, and ensuring that you’re viewed as a reliable friend.
“Life is slippery.
Here, take my hand.”
(H. Jackson Brown, Jr.)
3. Friends
value others who are authentic:
When they ask for your opinion on something that means they value what you
think. Don’t give up on them during their time of need (when they’re unable to
dig themselves out of their challenge). You should be comfortable enough
together to be honest about it what they need to be held accountable for.
We all get in unexpected trouble and
it’s good to know people who would be there to help. Help your friend conquer
their troubles by allowing them know they are not alone.
No one is perfect, but someone who can admit
they’re in the wrong is a great friend. Learn to be the kind of person your
friends turn to when their life is in shambles. Be sure not to manipulate
others by giving the impression of caring. Be sure to always see the other side
of the story in a disagreement.
“To be honest with you, I don't have the words to
make you feel better, but I do have the arms to give you a hug; ears to listen
to whatever you want to talk about; and I have a heart (a heart that's aching
to see you smile again).” (Laura Ortiz)
4.
Friends love to be happy for each
other: We can forget how to show
appreciation for each other. One way to do that is to be emotionally invested
in your friend successes. Throughout your friendship have times of complete fun
(and happiness), but know when turn it off by getting the important matters at
hand.
“I think if I've learned anything about friendship. It's
to hang in; stay connected; fight for them; and let them fight for you. Don't
walk away. Don't be distracted. Don't be too busy or tired. Don't take them for
granted. Friends are part of the glue that holds life and faith together. [They are] powerful stuff.” (Jon Katz)
5. Friends
are good listeners: To be a better listener, follow this advice: maintain
eye contact; remind yourself to focus on your undivided attention on your
friend’s situation by minimizing (or eliminating) distractions; and be careful
with advice by assuming your friend wishes to vent (unless otherwise
indicated).
Take listening further by always defending your friend
against other’s gossip (or criticism) if you are present. Even if you pay
attention and disagree with life choices a friend is making, it does not mean
that you cannot love them for the unique creation the Heavenly Father made
them. As a friend, avoid saying the one comment that induces shame. It is “I
told you so.” Realize that your friend is going to have some flaws. Accept the
good (and the bad) of your friend.
“In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire
goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being.
We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.” (Albert Schweitzer) [i]
“When we honestly ask ourselves which
person in our lives means the most to us; we often find that it is those who (instead
of giving advice, solutions, or cures) have chosen rather to share our pain (and
touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand). The friend who can be silent
with us in a moment of despair or confusion (who can stay with us in an hour of
grief and bereavement; who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing
and face with us the reality of our powerlessness) that is a friend who cares.”
(Henri
Nouwen)
[i] Sources used:
· “10 Tips on Being A
Good Friend” by Beverly Kesse
No comments:
Post a Comment