Sex
texting (or sexting for short) is sending, receiving, or forwarding sexually
explicit messages, photographs or images (primarily between
mobile phones). If you think teenagers haven’t
been exposed to it. Check out these statistics:
- 71% of teenage females (and 67% of teenage males) who
have sent (or posted) sexually suggestive content say they have sent (or
posted) this content to a boyfriend (or girlfriend).
“Keep your
reputation clean; careful what you write on the screen.”
- 21% of teenage females (and 39% of teenage males) say
they have sent such content to someone they wanted to date.
“Double-check
the recipient before you hit send, please.” (Holly Riordan)
- 38% of teenage females (and 39% of teenage males) say
they have had sexually suggestive text messages (or emails originally
meant for someone else) shared with them.
“What
you text today you might regret tomorrow, and it may cause you much pain and
sorrow.”
- 25% of teenage females (and 33% of teenage males) say
they have had nude or semi-nude images (originally meant for someone else)
shared with them.
“Send a nude to
one, be seen [by] many.”
Sexting (like other sexual experimentation) probably starts
as innocent curiosity. Once a digital image is made and hits cyberspace. It can
get out of control. If a tween (or teenage) is old enough to use a cell phone, they
are old enough for an open, honest, direct and age-appropriate conversation
about sexting. Here are five things everyone should know about it:
“You can’t unwrite what you submit (so when in doubt
just quit).”
1. Don’t Cave into Peer Pressure -
Sexting can be like any other peer pressure. Sexting, like any other sexual
activity is something intimate. If you wouldn’t go outside naked, why would you
send a picture that everyone could end up seeing when the image could be posted
to Facebook? Someone who really cares
about you will not put you in the position of doing something that makes you
uncomfortable.
“[It takes] less than a second to submit; a lifetime to
deal with the consequences.”
2. It’s a Form of Sexual Harassment -
It could land you in more trouble than it’s worth. A frightening number of laws
have been passed to make possessing, sending and taking pictures a form of
child pornography. The real issue is appropriate boundaries and a healthy
attitude about sexuality. You could still land in a lot of trouble with the law
if you engage in sexting (including being required to register as a sex
offender).
“The Internet makes
it easy for people to share things and stay connected, but it also makes it
easier to make mistakes and get into dangerous situations.” b4uclick.org
3. Your Photo or Message Will Likely Be Forwarded, Shared and
Posted - No matter how private you intend the message or image to be.
The best intentions can go bad when a fight (or break up) happens. A reputation
like this can be painful, difficult, and humiliating.
“In the vast majority of cases, the picture
lands only where it was meant to. But pictures sent as a result of pressure are
much more likely to be shared, and that rarely ends well.” (Hanna Rosin)
4. It’s Okay to Say “NO.” - Not only can
you say ‘no’ to taking and sending electronic pictures of your own. You can
help protect others by not participating in forwards and posts that others
send.
“Be smart; use your
wit, when it comes to sexting you should quit.”
5. There are Other Ways to Express Interest in Someone -
A risqué message (or picture) can accidentally be sent to someone unintended (causing
a lot of embarrassment). Even if you do only send it to one person; you have no control over whom that person
forwards it to. Instead of sexting, try sending flowers, going on a date, or
writing a letter (with a pen and paper).[ii]
“What are you doing?” he texted.
“I just got out of the shower and I’m about to go to sleep.” “Send me a
picture, please.” She caved. She sent it over Snapchat and said he had to let
it erase right away. He said he did. (Hanna Rosin)
One of the top duties of parents
is to teach their children to take responsibility for their own safety and
actions. It's important to receive this message regarding the virtual world of
the Internet. Even if a teen's intentions are playful or harmless, messages (or
pictures) can become public forever. The outcome can often be anything but
safe.[iii]
[i] All quotes are anti-sexting slogans taken from www.thinkslogans.com (unless otherwise noted).
[ii] Adapted from
“5 Things Parents Should Explain to Teenagers about Sexting” by Mod-Labadminstrator (as well
as Wikipedia).
[iii] Adapted from “Sexting: What Parents Need to Know”
Reviewed by Larissa
Hirsch, MD
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