Do you associate fear, hurt, or betrayal with the word vulnerability? The dictionary defines it as the state of being exposed to the possibility of being harmed either physically (or emotionally). These are deep feelings people experience when they reveal aspects of themselves to others. Vulnerability is not a sign of weakness. It can be your greatest strength. Those who protect themselves to avoid getting hurt by vulnerability fail to appreciate intimacy and close relationships.
To embrace vulnerability as your greatest strength, you will need to become aware of your pain points. Retaliation leads to suffering since you are likely to defend your pain like a wounded animal. We are born vulnerable and stay that way for our entire childhood. Our relationship with vulnerability is something we are acquainted with yet abandon as we merge into adulthood. Vulnerability is an act of courage because you merge with your authentic self instead of hiding behind a facade to appease others.
You must accept
your vulnerability if you wish to live a wholesome life. Even the smallest act
of letting down your guard is a commitment to your personal growth. It is
within the unknown where your greatest potential lies. Human nature is
imperfect, yet the inconsistency is that we are whole within that sphere of
imperfection. Here are five life-altering lessons about vulnerability:
1.
Dare to be yourself:
The forces of fear, insecurity, and doubt will never go away no matter how hard
you try to avoid, hide from, or attempt to bury them. Instead, face them with
courage and confidence in your authentic self and know that you’ve been given
the gifts necessary to overcome whatever is in front of you. Dare to be
yourself in all your glory, your strengths, skills, and beauty as well as your
flaws and insecurities. In doing so, you can realize true strength of spirit.
2.
Don’t bottle up your emotions. Become self-aware: Most of us were taught to hide
our emotions or run away from them. This causes
nothing but continuous pain and stress. The consequences are far-reaching, and
the longer we keep those emotions bottled up, the worse the situation gets.
Instead, we need to become more self-aware and explore our emotions, asking
questions to get in touch with how we’re feeling and thinking in a given
moment. Find a method for coxing these feelings out which works best for you
such as writing, meditation, or talking to a friend.
3.
Seek excellence not perfection: Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfectly,
look perfectly, and act perfectly, we can avoid the pain of blame, judgment,
and shame. Perfectionism isn’t about growth, improvement, or personal
achievement. It’s about fear and avoidance. What you should be focused on is
realizing excellence, the best version of yourself despite your flaws. This perspective is healthy and inclusive
and leads to real personal growth as opposed to a flawed perfectionism.
4.
Show up, face fear, and move forward: In everything we do, fear
and criticism will always be there to greet us.
Fear is the great restrictive force as it stops most people from ever stepping
outside their comfort zone towards realizing their true desires. Because fear
and criticism will always be there in some form, the best course of action is
to show up every day to do what you were meant to do. Don’t let these hindrances
stop you. The more you stand up to these negative forces, the more you’ll flex
your courage and resilience and come out stronger for it.
5.
Vulnerability takes courage: Most modern cultures err on the side of suppressed
feelings in an effort to display strength. Vulnerability
is anything but weakness. It takes true strength and courage to allow you to be
vulnerable. The gifts we unlock by being willing to be vulnerable far outweigh
the difficulty in doing so. By having the courage to be vulnerable and open up
to ourselves and the world around us we come directly in touch with our most
authentic self. In doing so, we can live a much more fulfilling and happier
life.
“I define vulnerability as uncertainty, risk,
and emotional exposure. With that definition in mind, let’s think about love.
Waking up every day and loving someone who may or may not love us back, whose
safety we can’t ensure, who may stay in our lives or may leave without a
moment’s notice, who may be loyal to the day they die or betray us
tomorrow—that’s vulnerability.” (Brené
Brown)[i]
[i] Sources used:
·
“5
Life-Altering Lessons from Brené Brown’s The Power of Vulnerability” By Matt Valentine
·
“How to Embrace Vulnerability as Your
Greatest Strength” by Tony Fahkry
·
“Vulnerability”
from English Oxford Living Dictionaries
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