Friday, October 5, 2018

Small Things

“Great things are done by a series of small things brought together.” (Vincent Van Gogh)

Togetherness is what makes us human.  Each person has a profound need to belong to a group of other people. Togetherness is the development of the self within the community of mankind. When bringing it into an ethical framework it can be called moral excellence. We need to bring more togetherness into parenting and education. Families and schools too often look like two different worlds with their own goals and methods.

Both have the same goal of providing the most favorable conditions for children to develop their talents and characteristics.  When parents can’t agree on how to raise their children, there is little chance that the family environment will be one of peace. In order for children to learn teamwork and togetherness, their parents must first learn to function as a unified team. Put the following suggestions into practice. You will make significant strides towards having a family that works together to create a happy, healthy home.

1.   Assign specific chores This will teach your children to have pride in their work and learn responsibility. Teach them that they are all accountable for certain chores, and that the whole family must work together in order to make your home a clean, orderly, and functional place to live.

 
2.   Communicate Regular communication with your spouse and children is vital to a healthy family. Have weekly family meetings where all family members can express themselves freely and openly without the fear of criticism. Talk to your children about future plans or problems and explain to them why you do certain things they may find unfair. By allowing your children to take an active part in family business, they will be more likely to want to help with any problem that needs to be solved.

 

3.   Establish routines  Habits help children to feel safe. Maintain a consistent schedule that is realistic for your family. For example, try to serve dinner at the same time each evening and expect everyone to attend whenever possible. Establish set bedtimes, especially for younger children, and make sure your children adhere to them. Having a schedule allows both parents and kids to know what to expect and when.

 
4.   Have fun together At least once a month, go on a family outing. These outings can be inexpensive and simple. Consider going on a trip to the woods, the museum, or the zoo. Having fun together as a family reinforces to your children that teamwork also means playing together.

 

5.   Listen to each other Try to consider the other person’s perspective. When you are listening, don’t think about what response you are going to give. Instead, ask yourself why your spouse or child feels the way he or she does. Listening is one of the most powerful ways you can show you care about the other person. Children need to know that they are important, and this can be shown through active listening.

 

6.   Seek spiritual experiences Attending church as a family helps you all realize that no one does life alone. Read the Bible to reinforce your family’s belief system of rightness. By reinforcing a value system that your family can share, you create a family culture that gives your children the sense of being part of a greater whole.

 

7.   Share household responsibilities Explain that if your family is a team they must all do their part in the family. Discuss with your spouse what you should expect from each child. Then tell the children what you would like, and what you expect. If you present a unified front when you propose this idea to your children you are more likely to get a positive reaction.

Coming together is the beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success.”  (Henry Ford)[i]


[i] Sources used:
·        “7 effective ways to build family unity” by Lynn Scoresby

·        7 Ways to Teach Your Kids the 5 Virtues of Unity” by Positive Psychology Program

This post is dedicated to my friend, Jan Bahr.                                                                                    

 




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