Barking Up the Wrong Tree

When someone offends you about something, you have the opportunity to respond with either option A or option B. Which will you choose?[i] (Only you can decide.)

 

OPTION A - the “Robert” Method (the Wrong Way)

 

1.  I vent to others about the issue (rather than calmly communicate with the offender).

 

2.  The listeners begin to think poorly of the offender (by agreeing with me about the wrongs they committed against me).

 

3.  They join in my conversation (by also speaking negatively about my offender).

 

4.  I have succeeding in causing someone else to sin against the Almighty. A division in the relationship these people may have with my offender has now occurred.

 

5.  I continue to make myself more upset (and mentally by reliving the details of the situation over in my mind.

 

6.  I am fully aware that my response to this situation is being driven by Satan (rather than my Heavenly Father).

 

OPTION B - the “Divine” Method (the Right Way)

 

1.  Proceed to the Almighty in prayer.

2.  God gives me the right perspective on this uncomfortable situation.

 

3.  I am emotionally at peace (and my need to vent to others that are uninvolved in the issue is gone.)

 

4.  My Heavenly Father has been honored by my actions in valuing unity over the temporary pleasure of gossiping (and gaining sympathy from others).

 

Below are some of my favorite quotes on this topic. (Can you relate to any of them?)

 

Ø “A word to those of you out there who have yet to be offended by something I have said: Please be patient. I am working as fast as I can.”[ii]

 

Ø “Being easily offended is a sign of selfishness, insecurity and lack of wisdom. It appears as a small problem, but in reality it will keep you from experiencing joy, peace, and God’s best for your life.”[iii]

 

Ø “Every day we have plenty of opportunities to get angry, stressed or offended. But what you're doing when you indulge these negative emotions is giving something outside yourself power over your happiness. You can choose to not let little things upset you.”[iv]

 

Ø “Getting offended is a great way to avoid answering questions that make you sound dumb.”[v]

 

Ø “If you are going to be offended by other people's opinions then maybe you should consider keeping yours to yourself.”[vi]  

 

Ø  “Just because you're offended, doesn't mean you're right.”[vii]    

 

Ø “My words will either attract a strong mind or offend a weak one.” [viii] 

 

Ø “We cannot choose who offends us, but we can choose how to respond when we are offended.” [ix]   Ø “When you are offended at any man's fault, turn to yourself and study your own failings. Then you will forget your anger.”[x]

 

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[i] The term “barking up the wrong tree” means that you have completely misunderstood something (or are totally wrong). This phrase alludes to dogs when they believe they have chased a squirrel up a tree, but instead discover them leaping from one tree to another. (Adapted from Wikipedia)

 This post is adapted from the notes of the sermon entitled “Someone Offended Me” from church of a co-worker friend of my wife, Bobbi.

 [ii] Quote by Ann Coulture

 

[iii] Quote by @ikbell123

 

[iv] Quote by Joel Osteen

 

[v] Quote by Tucker Max

 

[vi] Quote by JarofQuotes.com

 

[vii] Quote by Ricky Gervais

 

[viii] Quote by J. Johnson

 

[ix] Quote by Moffat Machingura, author of How I Kissed Heartbreak Goodbye

 

[x] Quote by Epictetus quotes (Greek philosopher, AD 55-c.135)