The Way We Talk at Church

The religious community has their own set of unique clichés that they understand completely. Below are sixteen of my favorites with commentary pulled from many different Internet sources (that I have edited for clarity).

1.  A Bible that’s falling apart usually belongs to someone who isn’t-Those who have Bibles that are falling apart should go buy a new one. Some Bibles that fall apart do so because they were abused by their owners. 


   When Bibles wear out because of use, the Christians using the scriptures can often be extremely proud, self-righteous, and judgmental. Being a biblical scholar does not guarantee Christ-like behavior.

And this also implies that, if really horrible things are happening to you, God “gave” it to you. Is this a test? Am I being punished? Is God just arbitrarily cruel?

2.  Bless your heart-This popular cliché (popular in the South) really means, “That was stupid. Why aren’t you smart enough to see that?”

 

3.  Do not forsake the assembling of yourselves together-This cliché is taken from Hebrews 10:25. It is often used as a club to beat Christians who are not following Jesus by loving and serving others. They may not be attending church on Sunday morning in building that fits the mold of the traditional church.

Don’t give beyond your means to a church or ministry based on this faulty understanding of finances. Don’t expect that by giving, God may give you greater financial wealth. (Blessings can come in other forms.) 

God gives us more than we can handle all the time. That’s how he grows our faith. The passage we often get confused about is 1 Corinthians 10:13. It’s referring to temptation (not trials or life’s circumstances).

4.  God helps those who help themselves-This is not in scripture. Benjamin Franklin penned this in the Farmers’ Almanac in 1757. People don’t need more reasons to resent (or resist) scripture. Let’s not add things that aren’t even in there.

5.  Hedge of protection-This phrase comes from Job 1:10. This catchphrase sounds more cliché than meaningful.  Say what you mean.  You want God’s protection in your life.

6.  I don’t feel led-Don’t use to get out of doing something unpleasant.

7.  I’ll pray about it- Christians often say this when they want to get themselves off the hook for their own personal decisions. This can be meaningful, but many times we use it as a conversation filler (or ender). It sounds so sound spiritual. Mean this if you say it. Pray immediately (or as soon as possible) for that person.

8.  If you just have enough faith (fill in the blank) will happen for you-Who are we to speak to what God will (or will not do) in others’ lives? If you have a story of personal experience to share, ask for permission to share it. But be aware that someone in the midst of struggle may not be in a place to hear it.

It seems from scripture that God is often at work in small, foolish, and insignificant ways with unimportant individuals, who are poor, powerless, and have no prestige.

9.  Love the sinner, hate the sin-This is a backhanded way to tell someone you love them. It also ignores the command by Jesus not to focus on the splinter in our neighbors’ eyes while a plank remains in our own (Matthew 7:4-5). We all mess up. Naming others’ sin as noteworthy while remaining silent about your own is arrogant.

10.     Overusing Father-God in prayer-Sometimes it’s hard to find the right words to pray. Don’t make the mistake of saying the same words repeatedly until something new comes to mind. Pause and gather your thoughts so your words have meaning.

Sitting in a building on Sunday morning doesn’t make you part of the church. Someone may never attend the acceptable model for a house of worship, and still be a member of the body of Christ. Nothing magical happens by sitting in a church pew to sing songs and listen to a sermon.

11.     The greatest distance in the universe is the eighteen inches between your head and your heart-What people mean when they say it is that following God is both about what you know and do. What we do is most often based on what we think. In Romans 12:1-2, we learn the restoration of one’s mind leads to new actions and behaviors.

12.     The Lord never gives someone more than they can handle-What about people with mental illness? What about people in war-torn countries who are tortured to death? What about the millions of Jews murdered in the Holocaust?

13.     When God closes a door, He opens a window- This implies that when something unexpected (and usually bad) happens, God did it to you. I know it’s well-meaning, but it’s not helpful in some cases. What about someone who feels like the door has closed on them, and there is no other hope in sight? Instead, try offering a compassionate ear, a loving heart and a simple “what can I do to help?”

14.     Where God guides; God provides-When people say this, what do they mean by “provide”? Does this refer to money and finances? That is the context in which I have always heard this statement said. If this is true, then the only things we should follow God in are the areas where finances are concerned?

Why add to the discomfort by making them stand so everyone can stare at them? Calling someone a visitor implies they are simply passing through, and not a part of things. Try using the word “newcomer,” or better yet walk up to them, introduce yourself, and learn their name.

15.     Will all our visitors please stand? If someone finally is brave enough to walk through the doors of your church, the last thing they want is to be singled out. They probably don’t know the worship songs you’re singing. They may not even know where the bathroom is.

16.     You can’t out give God- This Christian cliché is almost always stated in the context of monetary donations for a building project, a ministry opportunity, or some other fundraising campaign. While it is true that God is more generous than we can ever imagine, it is not true (as is often taught) that if we give lots of money that God will give us even more money.

Sometimes getting to know God through the avenues of reading the Bible, praying, and attending church can be rather intimidating. Don’t allow your fears (or prior bad experiences with church) keep you away from your Heavenly Father.

He knows all the good (and bad) about, and loves you inspite of that.  If He’s planning on being with you through the long haul, why would you run away from divine help? Speak with Him now. He awaits to hear from you.