Somewhere in the Middle

I believe “Franklin” and “Millie” stopped by my greeter’s station (grocery side) just to talk. Franklin reminded me a lot of a mischievous gray-haired leprechaun that had just stolen the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow with that twinkle in his eyes.

He couldn’t wait to tell me his proud news. Millie gleamed and smiled (with the look of a woman well-loved)and listened as he spoke. I got the feeling she’d learn to accept his endearing manners a long time ago.

“We celebrated our 50^th wedding anniversary last week,” Franklin said.

Lately, I’ve been trying to focus on all the positive aspects of a great marriage (see Meant to be). With a milestone like this, I like to get any good advice I can from the pros. “Congratulations, what is the secret to your marital success? How have you managed to stay together that long?”

Millie gently put her arm around her husband (since 1965) as Franklin gave some of the wisest counsel I’ve ever heard. “You marry the right person.”

With the rise of divorce today, I wondered how one could know they’d married the right person. People change throughout the life of marriage. Sometimes the person you started with is not the same one you currently have. Is love enough? Maybe these are good questions for a counselor.

I spoke up again, “My wife and I are opinionated. We tend to argue frequently.”

Millie was shaking her head this time as Franklin spoke again. “We are both rather opinionated too. I think the key is to compromise, and for both of you to meet somewhere in the middle.”

As the couple left with their cart to somewhere in the store, I thought about all the divine connections that connected me to my wife. What are the chances that the woman I would one day marry would be working for the company my organization did business with?

How many times in real life does a Robert marry a Bobbi (not a nickname)? How many couples have birthdays right next to each other (August 18^th and 19^th); mothers with the same middle name (Lou), or fathers deceased before they met, and two siblings?

As angry as I can get with Bobbi at times, I know only God could have brought us together. We each had what the other was craving for in a spouse. Bobbi wanted a man with a strong sense of God and family.

I was looking for someone to love who could be the organized homemaker to keep our dwelling happy and together in one piece (even when offspring entered the picture).

I would love to say I have all the answers to a blissful marriage, but I don’t. Neither Bobbi nor I are always pleasant to each other. We know each other’s “hot buttons,” and occasionally take advantage of that.

If you are single and hoping to be married one day, the best advice I can give is to work on yourself. Strive to be the type of person with the character qualities you would like to marry one day (in a partner). Once you are married; changes made in yourself will often have an effect (positive or negative) on the person you married. Why carry unneeded baggage into marital union if you don’t have to?