Search

“If you want to understand today, you have to search yesterday.” (Pearl S. Buck)

Genealogy is the study of family ancestors with pertinent data such as birth, marriage and death dates. Family History is an in-depth study of a family lineage with greater emphasize and clarification of each ancestor’s life story. There is a difference between genealogy and family history, but both are dependent to varying degrees on each other. Genealogy can be compared to the trunk of a tree, but a rich family history truly gives the tree its color, leaves, flowers and majestic appearance.

A good family history tells a story about an individual or a certain family. Much can be learned by using diaries, journals, family Bibles, newspaper articles, early family history books, letters or scrapbooks that were created by a certain ancestor and handed down over the generations. If you've decided to dig into your family history, but aren't sure where to begin, these five basic steps will get you started on the fascinating journey into your past.

 

1.   Begin with Names- First names, middle names, last names, nicknames...names often provide an important window into the past. Names in your family tree can be found by looking at old certificates and documents, by asking your relatives, and by looking at family photos and newspaper clippings (wedding announcements, obituaries, etc.).

 

Search especially for maiden names for any female ancestors as they may help identify the parents, taking you back a generation in the family tree. Naming patterns used in the family may also hold a clue to previous generations. Family surnames were often adopted as given names, as were middle names which sometimes indicate the maiden name of a mother or grandmother.

 

 Watch also for nicknames, as they may also help you identify your ancestors. Expect to encounter plenty of spelling variations as name spellings and pronunciations generally evolve over time, and the surname your family uses now may not be the same as the one they began with. Names are also often just written down wrong, by people who spelled phonetically, or by individuals trying to transcribe messy handwriting for an index.

 

2.   Compile Vital Statistics-As you search for the names in your family tree, you should also gather the vital statistics that go with them. Most importantly you should look for dates and places of births, marriages, and deaths.

 

Again, turn to the papers and photos in your home for clues, and ask your relatives for any details they can provide. If you run across conflicting accounts — two different birth dates for great Aunt Emma, for example — just record them both until more information comes along which helps point to one or the other.

 

3.   Collect Family Stories- As you quiz your relatives about names and dates, take time to elicit and write down their stories as well. The 'history' in your family history begins with these memories, helping you to really get to know the people your ancestors were.

 

Among these stories, you may learn of special family traditions or famous family legends that have been passed down from generation to generation. While they will likely contain some creative remembrances and embellishments, family stories generally have some basis in fact, providing clues for further research.

 

4.   Select a Focus-After gathering names, dates, and stories about your family, the next step is to choose a specific ancestor, couple, or family line on which to focus your search. You could choose to learn more about your dad's parents, an ancestor you were named after, or all descendants of your maternal grandparents.

 

The key here isn't what or who you choose to study; just that it is a small enough project to be manageable. This is especially important if you're just starting out on your family tree quest. People who try to do it all at once tend to get bogged down in details, often overlooking important clues to their past.

 

5.   Chart Your Progress-Genealogy is basically one big puzzle. If you don't put the pieces together in just the right way, then you'll never get to see the final picture. To make sure your puzzle pieces end up in the proper positions pedigree charts and family group sheets can help you record your research data and keep track of your progress.

 

Genealogy software programs are another good option for recording your information and will allow you to print out the data in a nice variety of chart formats. Blank genealogy charts can also be downloaded and printed for free from many different websites. Don't forget to take a little time out to record what you've looked at and what you found (or didn't find)!

 “The heart and soul of genealogy is uncovering and learning the stories of our ancestors. It’s about them, but if your end goal is name or name dropping, you’re making it all about you. It’s the historical version of a selfie.” (Megan Smolenyak)[i]

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[i] Sources used:

·        “5 First Steps to Finding Your Roots” by Kimberly Powell

·        “Think There is No Difference in Genealogy vs. Family History?” by familytree.com

·        “What is Genealogy?” by FamilyTree.com

This post dedicated to my wife, Bobbi, who enjoys doing this when time allows.

Tears

“There are more tears shed over answered prayers than over unanswered prayers.” (Saint Teresa of Avila)

What would you tell a person who has been praying faithfully for the same thing for many years, and still hasn't seen any change in the situation? Does prayer really change things? Can the Sovereign Lord, who knows everything, be persuaded to change His mind? If not, what's the point of making our requests known to Him? The power of prayer is a mystery. We can't explain it. Either we must embrace it by faith or simply leave it alone.

Prayer is not about results. It's about having a relationship with the Heavenly Father. In order that we might know Him, trust Him, and remember Him in all our ways. He wants us to become involved and play an active role in the mystery of His plan for the universe. But He doesn't promise to be our personal wish-fulfiller.

Scripture teaches us that prayer can make a real difference in the course of human events. If you doubt this, consider Abraham's intercessions on behalf of Sodom in Genesis 18:16-33, Hezekiah's prayer for the extension of his life in Isaiah 38, or the church's pleas for Peter's release from prison in Acts 12:1-19. Do unanswered prayers mean that God doesn’t care, or that He’s not even there? God has a message to send you through the silence. Here’s how you can hear Him, even when He doesn’t answer your prayers:

1.   Ask yourself if Satan is opposing your prayers-Know that Satan will sometimes try to block your prayers from being answered by contesting them. Ask God to help you persevere in prayer and stand in courage against evil so you can break through spiritual opposition. Learn about spiritual warfare and use Scripture as your weapon in the battle. Ask God to reveal how you should best pray into the situation. Try fasting. Spend time worshipping Jesus.

 

2.   Ask yourself if there is a secret sin you need to confess-Understand that disobedience may block your prayers from being answered. Find a Christian friend you trust, and confess any sin you haven’t yet confessed. Repent of that sin by turning away from it and turning toward God. Pursue healing for wounds that keep you tied to sinful thought or behavior patterns. Ask God to give you the strength to forgive or apologize to people to whom you need to do so.

 

3.   Ask yourself if you’re actively pursuing justice-Know that some prayers aren’t answered because of disregard for oppressed people in your own community, and around the world. Make sure you’re seeking to express God’s love for people who are marginalized in society such as the poor and the disabled. Practice hospitality. Volunteer for service projects. Act politically to support causes that God leads you to support.

 

4.   Ask yourself if you’re expecting God to spare you from the normal consequences of living in a fallen world-Acknowledge that in our fallen world suffering is common for every human being. Expect to have trouble in this world. Discuss your situation with some faithful friends and honestly consider whether God is asking you to pray against your suffering, or whether He simply wants to give you the grace to endure it with Him alongside you.

 

5.   Ask yourself if you’re trying to find answers in situations where you need to simply trust instead-Realize that if you’re doing everything right, but your situation still doesn’t make sense you can still hold onto God like a hurting kid embracing his or her father. Be connected to God and keep trusting Him while you go through your current challenges. Know that your challenges are not in vain because God will use them to make you a better person.

 

6.   Be honest- Admit your disappointment, frustration, confusion, doubt, sorrow, anger, and any other feelings you have about the fact that you haven’t yet received answers to your prayers. Don’t be afraid to express yourself completely to God without shame or pretense. Pray about every concern you have. Ask God hard questions.

 

7.   Be willing to accept “no” as an answer-Consider carefully whether God has not answered your prayer, or whether He has answered it, but chosen to deny your request. Ask God to give you the strength to accept His will even if it’s contrary to your wishes. Realize that your power to choose God’s will over your own preference is a significant opportunity to grow in faith and maturity.

 

God’s wisdom is often beyond human understanding, but He is always working out the best for you from His eternal perspective. Ask God to help you learn the valuable lessons He wants to teach you through your suffering, so that suffering will ultimately lead you to greater joy.

 

8.   Realize that silence doesn’t mean absence-Know that God is still present with you despite His silence. Remember His promise never to leave or forsake you. Understand that God sometimes decides to withdraw from your conscious experience and deliberately make Himself less obvious and less immediately available in order to reduce your dependence on outward things and help you live by faith. Ask God to reassure you of His presence as you struggle with unanswered prayers.

 

9.   Seek God Himself instead of just His miracles-Understand that, although God sometimes does choose to perform miracles for certain purposes, He often decides not to do so. Believe in the truth that a miracle is always possible, but remember that miracles are rare by definition. Check your motives to make sure you’re not just vying for a miracle, but instead are seeking to grow closer to God. Don’t expect God to be like a divine vending machine who dispenses miracles on demand. Love God Himself more than what He can give you.

 

10.       Trust in God’s love- Know that nothing can ever separate you from God’s love. Regularly remind yourself of specific ways God has already shown you that He loves you, such as through answered prayer in the past and His promises in scripture. Recognize the blessings you currently have that you haven’t noticed before and thank God for them. Remember that God often expresses His love through the kindness of faithful people. Choose to take God at His word and believe that He cares about you no matter what.

 “Sometimes God doesn't give you what you think you want not because you don't deserve it, but because you deserve something so much more.” (Anonymous)[i]

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[i] Sources used:

·        “Hear the Silent Message in Unanswered Prayer” by Pete Greig

·        “How should a Christian respond to unanswered prayer?” by Got Questions

·        “Unanswered Prayer” by Focus on the Family

 

Confusion

“God is not a God of confusion but a God of peace. This is the rule for all the meetings of God’s people.” (1 Corinthians 14:33, ERV)

As you are learning to read the Bible, your notes, research, observations, and conclusions won’t always be perfect. That’s just part of being human Continue to read, continue to talk with other believers about what they are learning. God will be faithful to illuminate His revealed Word to you, but you must study it for Him to be able to do so. It’s not hard to find a Christian who is taking a verse or passage of the Bible out of context.

Misreading the Bible can lead to damaging effects: cults, trauma, and spiritual abuse. It’s so important to know what the Bible says, and understand God’s will for us. Are you reading the Bible correctly? Should I read everything in the Bible as literal or figurative? What’s the point of reading the poetry in the Bible? Why does it matter who wrote the books of the Bible?

These are just some questions that both new believers and veterans face all the time. And they’re important questions. The Bible is a supernatural book that can bring power into our lives. As you are learning to read the Bible, there are several common pitfalls that people easily fall into, and being aware of them will help you to guard against them as you seek to learn truth:

1.   Do not apply Old Testament law to your life and fail to understand that you live in the new covenant of grace- God is not operating in the anger and judgment that came with the law. Because of the cross, He deals differently with us now. Interpreting the New Testament through the lens of the Old when it should be the other way around. Jesus is the “express image” of God (Hebrews 1:3). That means that He and His Words best represent God. If there seem to be conflicting ideas between the Testaments, the New Testament should prevail.

 

2.   Don’t focusing more on the things you don’t understand-It’s good to wrestle with hard passages, and sometimes great revelation comes. Don’t get stuck. If you don’t understand something now, you may later. Don’t stumble. If something doesn’t make sense, move on to what does make sense. Don’t give up. Much of the Bible is hard to read, but much of it is also easy. Move on to what you can handle.

 

3.   Don’t read the Bible without a plan-Don’t just take a page from a devotion book. Read through entire books of the Bible, progressing at three or four chapters a day if possible. This way, you will begin to understand the context and the bigger picture of the Bible. Devotion books are fine, but they shouldn’t be your main source of spiritual nourishment. It’s a good idea to read a chapter or two in both the Old and New Testaments daily. You could work through Genesis while working through the Gospel of Matthew. Read the Bible with a sense of expectation and faith that the Lord will speak to you through it. Mix your faith with the Bible and success will come.

 

4.   Don’t read the Bible without taking it personally-When it says, “Grace and peace to you,” take it personally and thank God. It was written to others, but it applies to you as well. When it speaks of God’s love, believe it. When you see an encouraging promise, take it and say, “That’s mine.”Don’t read the Bible more to build up a set of proof texts or to confirm a creed than to find out what you can use to draw closer to God.  There are scholars who quote the Bible, but don’t know God. Read devotionally, with prayer and worship. The goal is to know Him through it.

 

5.   Don’t reading the Bible too fast-The Bible is a supernatural book and not a novel. It requires your deliberate attention. Search for meaning in it as you would for gold. Meditation is the process of going over a text and thinking about it repeatedly. What did it mean in its original context? How does it apply today? What does it teach about God or man? How might I worship God because of what I’ve read?

6.   Don’t try too hard to make everything fit into a rigid system of theology- Certain scriptures will come up that challenge your theology. Sometimes you will be able to understand how it fits, but other times you won’t. Resist the temptation to twist the scripture to mean something it doesn’t. Understand that God is bigger than our theological boxes that try to contain Him. Learn how to be free and say, “I don’t understand how this fits.

“Ultimately I think the difference between reading the Bible and studying it is making the connections between who Jesus is and what he's done.” (Mark Driscoll)[i] 

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[i]  Sources used:

·                “10 Mistakes to Avoid When Reading the Bible” by Rick S. Bell

·        “5 Mistakes People Make When Reading the Bible” by Mike Query

·                “8 Mistakes People Make When Reading the Bible—and How to Avoid Them” by ⋅ Rose Publishing

·        “Learning To Read The Bible: 5 Common Mistakes To Avoid” by Emily Kurz

 

 

Learned

“I’ve learned more from pain than I could’ve ever learned from pleasure.” (Sonya Teclai)

Life is not always easy when you are pursuing something worthwhile, but experience can be a valuable instructor. As children, we watch how our parents handle the challenges of their life. We look at their accomplishments and hope to be just like them.

 We also observe their mistakes, and vow to not do that. While it’s true, we do learn from the people around us. Many times, we learn lessons from wiser people that have already experienced our life difficulties. We seldom learn to take intelligent advice in advance. Sometimes the most important life lessons are the ones we learn the hard way

1.   "Nothing is impossible- the word itself says, I'm possible"-This quote from Audrey Hepburn reminds us to stay positive and hopeful--not the easiest task when the world is wrapped up in pessimism and doubt. “Believe in your own abilities and have faith in your success.”

 

2.   Don't let the fear of losing be greater than the pleasure of winning-Many leaders express their fear of losing or failing or underachieving. Excitement over winning should be more than the idea of losing. Your enthusiasm for success should be more than your fear of failing so it gives you the focus and energy to do what you have to be to succeed.

 

3.   Failure isn't fatal and success isn't final-There's a saying (often attributed to Winston Churchill) that goes "Defeat is never fatal. Victory is never final. It's courage that counts." Success has a way of ebbing and flowing, and it's being able to ride the wave without falling off that the biggest lessons are learned.

 

4.   If you're not willing to risk the usual, you'll have to settle for the ordinary- Taking risks shows confidence--it means you are willing to learn. And the lessons you take with you can put you on an important new path. Unless you're extraordinarily lucky, success won't fall in your lap--you have to pursue it, and you won't achieve your dreams by playing it safe. The biggest risk is not taking any risk at all.

  

5.   Success is where preparation and opportunity meet-If you're waiting around for someone to make something happen for you, you're waiting in vain. Anything good that happens will be because you made it happen. Experiences and opportunities don't just come your way; you have to help create them.

 

6.   The road to success and the road to failure are one in the same-It may look as though your path is rocky and steep while others have it easier, but everyone faces obstacles and detours. We can't always control the road we're on, but the choices we make along the way will play a large part in determining how far we can go.

 

7.   What's holding you back are the thought that something is holding you back-Resentment, anger, grudges--these things will destroy your energy and keep you from moving forward. Turn them loose and you can free yourself up for great things.

“Life goes on whether you choose to move on and take a chance in the unknown or stay behind, locked in the past, thinking of what could've been. I don’t want to live in the past anymore. I’m so lonely here, there’s nothing for me here anymore.”  (Stephanie Smith)[i]

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[i] Sources used:

·        “21 Valuable Lessons Most People Learn the Hard Way” by Dreana Weston

·        “5 life lessons you will learn the hard way” by Dhaval Gajera

·       “7 Important Life Lessons Everyone Learns the Hard Way”  by Lolly Daskal

 

Humility

“Humility makes us ready to be blessed by the God of all grace.” (Charles Spurgeon)

Dear God,

I trust You will get this letter wherever You are. I’m writing to You because I have a very special request. This isn’t Your typical prayer because I’m not asking for something small. I’m also not asking for You to intervene and restore peace in the growing number of war-torn countries, to end world hunger and poverty, to heal disease, or to make my dreams come true, but I am asking for a miracle. In fact, this is the biggest, most significant, and most important thing I’ve ever asked for. I want to know who You are, what You’re all about, and what You’re like.

I’ve spent my whole life being told by others who You are and who You’re not, what You are and what You’re not, how You are and how You’re not, and everything in between. I’ve been told where I would find You and where not even to bother looking. I’ve seen so many different depictions and pictures of You, and I’ve heard countless stories about You including many people’s personal accounts of their experiences of You.

I’ve heard it said that You are Love and that I only need to look within to discover You. When I think about that, my heart lights up, and yet so many people become closed and shut down at the mere mention of Your name. In my lifetime, I’ve also witnessed senseless tragedies and acts of violence committed in Your name and several disasters signaling the decline of our planet and civilization. Some say that if You really existed, You would have intervened, and others say that these things have happened because we have created them with the free will that You gave us.

Throughout all of this, I admit that I’ve had my moments of doubting You and questioning You, but deep down in my heart and soul, my faith and belief in You have always remained strong.

Now I’m coming straight to You. I’m going to the source and asking You to let me get to know You, to reveal Your true nature to me so that I might live in complete alignment with You and give my life to serving Your purpose. That’s what I really want more than anything else, and in order to do that, I feel I have to know You, and our connection has to be direct, personal, intimate, and undeniable.

I know there’s this tricky thing about faith, which says that true faith is measured by our belief in that which we haven’t seen, experienced, or had proof of. I hear that, and I understand it. Rest assured, this request is not a question of faith. I have faith (a heart full of it). I believe You are real. I know You exist. I have no doubt about that whatsoever. I am not asking for a sign or for proof of any of that.

I’m asking to know who You are. I want to feel Your presence and recognize it the way a child knows his mother’s touch or the sound of his father’s voice. I want to know You so closely that I can be as cozy with You as I am with my best friends knowing that You get me and that You are there for me even when I’m not making sense or going off the rails. God, wherever You are and whoever You are, I’m ready to receive You with open arms and a heart full of love.

I’m ready to live my life to serve Your purposes and to further Your cause. With my own free will, I’m coming to You and asking You to let me in, let me see You, not obscured by others, no degrees of separation, completely revealed, as the true essence of who You are. I am ready. I am listening. I love You.

Chris

 “We must be ready to allow ourselves to be interrupted by God.” (Dietrich Bonhoeffer)[i]

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[i] Adapted from: “An Open Letter to God” by Chris Assaad

Church at CenterPoint Church Gahanna was closed on Sunday, January 20, 2019, due to a level 2 snow emergency. This is my Sunday sermon post substitute.

 

The Dance

 “Sign language is a dance with words to be enjoyed from babyhood through childhood to adulthood.” (Marilyn Daniels)

American Sign Language (ASL) is a complete, complex language that employs signs made by moving the hands combined with facial expressions and postures of the body. It is the primary language of many North Americans who are deaf and is one of several communication options used by people who are deaf or hard-of-hearing.

The exact beginnings of ASL are not clear, but some suggest that it arose more than 200 years ago from the intermixing of local sign languages and French Sign Language (LSF, or Langue des Signes Française).Today’s ASL includes some elements of LSF plus the original local sign languages, which over the years have melded and changed into a rich, complex, and mature language. Modern ASL and modern LSF are distinct languages and, while they still contain some similar signs, can no longer be understood by each other’s users.

Parents are often the source of a child’s early acquisition of language, but for children who are deaf, additional people may be models for language acquisition. A deaf child born to parents who are deaf and who already use ASL will begin to acquire ASL as naturally as a hearing child picks up spoken language from hearing parents. For a deaf child with hearing parents who have no prior experience with ASL, language may be acquired differently. Having a child who is hearing impaired can be life changing and mean that parents will need to sign to the baby from an early age.

In fact, nine out of 10 children who are born deaf are born to parents who hear. Did you know that 92% of deaf children are born to parents who can both hear? Hearing parents who choose to learn sign language often learn it along with their child. Surprisingly, children who are deaf can learn to sign quite fluently from their parents, even when their parents might not be perfectly fluent themselves. Here are some things you might not have realized about ASL

1.   Around 70% of lip reading is guesswork: We’ve all seen detective programs where the crime stopping hero lip reads from a Closed-Circuit Television (CCTV). This is often not the case. It is a well known joke in deaf circles that mouthing the words ‘elephant’s shoes’ without making a sound, looks remarkably like saying ‘I love you’ - this is one that can often lead to awkward situations! 

 

2.   Not all deaf people can sign: Contrary to common perception not all deaf people use sign language to communicate. According to the British Deaf Association around 150,000 people use Sign Language as their first language. This must be compared with the 800,000 people in the United Kingdom who are severely or profoundly deaf. 

 

3.   Sign language has its own grammar: If someone raises their voice when speaking, the meaning of the statement or question can change. Similar to this, when signing the grammar can also change. For example, when it comes to questions, eyebrow position is important; if you are asking who, what, when, where, why question, your eyebrows should go down. Alternatively for a yes/no question they should go up. Getting this wrong is equivalent to hearing someone speak in a foreign language. 

 

4.   Sign language is not universal: Every language has a different type of sign and like spoken language these have developed over time. Some words can be signed very differently in British and American Sign Language; in fact they only have 31% of the same signals. 

 “In hearing culture, facial expression is very limited. If you move your face or body a lot while you are talking, you can be seen as weird. However, facial expression and body movement is required for ASL. It’s part of ASL grammar.” (Michelle Jay)[i]

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[i] Sources used:

·        “5 things you didn’t know about sign language” by Jane McGuire

·        “American Sign Language” by NIDCD

·       “Closed-circuit television” from Wikipedia

This post is dedicated to my wife, Bobbi, who is deaf in one ear.